Child or career? This question evokes in young mothers the same heavy thoughtfulness that Hamlet has about his “to be or not to be.” Of course, most often we end up combining both raising a child and work. But there are also those who have already made a choice in favor of a career... as a housewife.
Being a housewife is not a person, it is a way of life. This “name” does not say anything about the woman herself: neither about her inclinations, nor about her family, nor about her character - well, literally nothing. It only says that the woman is currently taking care of the house and children. But we’ll try to figure it out why she does this and how she feels. “Desperate Housewives” on TV, inspired or tired at the stove, thriving or not so much on the playground - housewives are everywhere. The concept of “housewife”, not completely swept away by the broom of feminism, is again in force. If previously this path was chosen by calm women without any special ambitions, now it is precisely their opposites who are becoming “housewives” - career, successful, accomplished ones. In America, they even came up with an eloquent term - “maternal madness”: this is how they try to explain the behavior of those women who, having received several educations and reached high positions, abandon their careers in order to concentrate on the family. In Europe, “maternal madness” has not yet reached the masses, but changes are still being felt: the average age of a housewife is rapidly falling. In our country, the number of such women is also increasing, and most often a woman leaves work after the birth of her second child.
Self-realization: 1 - 0 in favor of working women
Being a housewife very often means living someone else's life - your husband and/or children, but not your own. “Breathe” their interests, immerse yourself in their problems. Of course, such an existence allows you to feel needed, useful, and in demand. The thought “They are nowhere without me” warms the soul. But the children grow up, and the husband—the husband may leave. The spiritual vacuum that has been accumulating for years will be very difficult, if not impossible, to fill overnight. The advice of others to “Live for yourself” is perceived... as mockery. A working woman still has less chance of becoming Chekhov’s “Darling”, if only because her circle of social contacts is wider. After all, before you realize yourself, it wouldn’t hurt to figure out what exactly you want, in what area do you want to reveal your talents? This is exactly the most difficult question for those who stay at home: housewives can be damn talented, but not even know it. So the presence of other people who will give feedback, or simply “throw out” ideas, is a must. And a working woman is more interesting to her husband - there is something to discuss with her, there is a reason to be a little jealous - so it won’t be boring.
You will never be bored
Have you ever seen a bored housewife? Even if we have met, it is very rare - these are women who have a limited range of interests. A deep, developed personality can never be made bored if it has an immensely wide field for activity. You can come up with interesting tasks for yourself within the framework of your responsibility, change their sequence.
Seven phrases that will inspire a woman
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How to learn to be proud of yourself?
Finance: 1 - 0 in favor of working women
Those who work in an office, as a rule, perform certain job responsibilities, have a standardized (at least conditionally) working day and regular payment for their work. A housewife’s schedule is usually built according to the fairy-tale principle “And you sleep, rest” (“Wash the hut, clean the yard, milk the cows, let them out to pasture, tidy up the barn and sleep and rest! Cook breakfast, warm the samovar, feed breakfast – sleep and rest ! You will work in the field or weed in the garden, if in winter you go for firewood or for hay and then sleep and rest"), and no financial reward is provided at all. In fact, this situation can be described as “Working for food.” Let's be honest, the role of the “eternal supplicant” is far from the most pleasant.
Liability: 1 - 0 in favor of housewives
It’s convenient when there is a reliable person nearby who is ready to shoulder the burden of responsibility for what is happening on his shoulders, and makes all the fateful decisions for you. All that remains is to go with the flow, without doubting that the husband really knows what will be best. And the wife is pleased - and the husband’s self-esteem rises. Many working ladies have probably sympathized more than once with the hero of the joke, who was busy with the nervous, exhausting work of sorting oranges (large ones in one box, small ones in another), who complained that “all I do all day is make decisions.”
LiveInternetLiveInternet
Monday, April 09, 2012 11:12 + to quote book
In higher education institutions. Some years. With exams and tests. For example, the famous Smolny Institute: it produced wonderful housewives, whom even great princes and royalty did not disdain. Because being a homemaker is an art, a science, and one of the hardest jobs in the world to master.
To become a real housewife in our difficult times, you need to at least know the five basic rules of this profession. Rule one: Don't consider yourself a victim Do you know that hundreds and thousands of women around the world dream of retiring quickly so that they can eventually become real housewives? Do you know that millions of working ladies are acutely envious of your apple pies, embroidered vests and purple clematis at the country windows? Did you know that a good housewife is able to make a real president out of her own husband - no matter what, a country, a company or a football club. You are not a victim - you are a happy woman who has the chance to build a nest. Rule two: Consider your interests Who told you that a housewife is a slave? Who decided that first of all a hot lunch, and then a manicure? Who calculated that in one single day you can physically manage to serve a small child, take your nephew to the zoo, clean the house and cook fresh food three times? The first thing a good housewife should be able to do is to be calm, rested and happy. This is a test of professional aptitude. And until you achieve this, you shouldn’t be allowed near the stove. Rule three: Work Keep in mind (and tell your loved ones): being a housewife means working. Not a single living soul has the right to tell you something like “you sit at home all day, and I came home from work tired.” But, at the same time, you will also not be entirely right if you lie down on the sofa in front of the TV. Work is work: with a distribution of responsibilities and awareness of rights, with meetings and planning meetings, with a clear daily routine and the desire to get everything done. Rule four: Eat and eat well.
Housewives often slip into the “while I was cooking, I tried it” mode, don’t eat as expected, snack on cookies and bagels, and, as a result, gain incredible weight. They blur and hate themselves, become depressed, go on diets, get angry and nervous, have a breakdown, get fat again - it’s just a horror movie. So a normal, balanced diet is the most important thing for a housewife. Rule five: Love yourself for who you are, even if you’re fat. Even unkempt. Even tired. Even unhappy. Love yourself every way. And the one who loves himself will find time for his hair, and for relaxation, and for happiness. https://www.velvet.by/domovodstvo/vse-o-dome/articles/kak-stat-idealnoi-domokhozyaikoi
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Career: oddly enough 1 - 1
A housewife who has “come to her senses”, who has not worked for a day in her specialty, and then (10 years later) decides to go back to work, will not be in for the most pleasant surprises. Few employers (unless he is a friend of her husband, lover, her own, etc.) will be happy with an “adult” employee with no work experience and no professional skills. But with adequate self-esteem and a positive attitude, these difficulties can be overcome, especially if you don’t set your goal to get an office job in order to “get out into the world” or “get married again,” but go freelance or start your own business.
Housewives' Potential Relationship Problems
- they say that all of them will face a lonely old age with cats. But for non-working women at home, everything is chocolate. But in fact, there are problems and conflicts in every marital union, and it doesn’t matter whether women work there or not. It’s just that the nature of these problems is different. Let's look at 5 typical problems of unemployed women today and find out how these problems can be solved.
1.Emotional devastation
When a woman had an active social life and then suddenly “bang” settled at home, the first thing she encounters is emotional emptiness. Work is not only stress and problems, it is also a fireworks display of emotions. And for any woman, emotions are a drug. After sitting like this for a year or two, taking care of only the house and children, any woman will want to fill this emptiness, and she will entrust the task of filling it to her husband.
Does my husband need this? Of course not. This is where the grievances begin: you don’t spend much time with me, you don’t take me anywhere, you and I don’t have any fun, etc.
What does such emptiness lead to next? Very often a woman begins to inflate any problem to the scale of the universe, she wants to get emotional, so without noticing it herself, she begins to little by little gnaw at her man’s brain.
It’s not that women are bad, it’s just how we are designed - we regularly need a change of emotions, without this we begin to get sick and mope. Women on maternity leave also face this problem. But still, the maternity period has its own characteristics, and completely unemployed women have their own.
2. Loss of husband's interest
Despite the fact that you may be just a home fairy and queen of the hearth, your husband is surrounded by several other women at work, especially if your husband is an office worker. There, smart career women, dressed in businesslike fashion, walk along the corridors, who somehow magically learned to combine both family and work.
This everyday contrast of female types, willy-nilly, forces men to come to the conclusion that women are more energetic and interesting at work. It’s not a fact that husbands will start cheating. But this can affect communication and the emotional background of marriage.
3. Sexual boredom
No matter how cool and sexy a homemaker a wife may be, one way or another, she very quickly turns into the image of a mother in a man’s subconscious. Grandfather Freud wrote about this phenomenon.
My husband comes home from work - dinner is already served, all the clothes are washed, the apartment is cleaned, groceries are bought. All conversations are about his social activities and about your everyday problems. Everything is like in his childhood. He went to school or college, came back - the same picture, only his mother was there.
Because of such a subconscious change in image from wife to mother, the husband, unexpectedly, even for himself, may begin to lose desire. Problems of sexual boredom exist in almost all families. But in families with house wives, this problem definitely comes earlier.
⠀ 4. Financial problems
Not all of us have oligarch husbands, so there can be many financial problems. Starting with the fact that the man will not be ready to pay for all his wife’s wants - dresses, handbags, boots... The classic question from husbands is “Why do you need new ones, do you already have all this?” Continuing with the growing emotional tension of the wife, that she is tired of acting all the time as a “begger” - they say, a “normal man” should allocate all these amounts to his wife himself and without reminders. And ending with the fact that not all husbands have financial savings. If the salary is just about enough for basic expenses, the family does not have a financial safety net, then the man’s income may begin to stagnate greatly. Especially if this is a business area. And all because the man will think 10 times whether to take the risk or not, because if it doesn’t pay off, the family will starve. But purely psychologically, men cannot allow this. If the family has other sources of income, for example, the wife’s salary, then men have more room for maneuver. Or you need savings.
Woman's addiction
Many bloggers and “specialists in women’s happiness” shout at the top of their lungs that there is no need to be afraid of this addiction. Close your eyes and fall back, your husband will definitely catch you and carry you in his arms for the rest of his life. Unfortunately, life makes its own adjustments, and the world is full of tragic stories. When, due to complete financial insolvency, a woman was unable to leave a manipulator, a psychological and physical tyrant, a total womanizer who does not value her, and other destructive personalities. It’s the fool’s own fault, where was she looking when she got married?! Well, excuse me, we have such “fools” in half the country and everyone had their own reasons for marrying such men. Plus, in countries with the highest percentage of male alcoholism, it’s somehow scary to put everything on the man’s responsibility. Therefore, no matter what, personal financial flows have never been superfluous for a woman.
Problem solving
The fact that you don’t go to work every day from 9 to 18 does not mean that you should become a shadow of your husband and children. Children need to be given time and attention, but as in the case of men, you cannot dissolve in them as a person. First of all, this harms the children themselves, since sooner or later they will need to leave their parents' home. And if the mother devoted her whole life to them, then psychologically she will hold on to them. Adult children leave good parents! ⠀ How to avoid the above problems? There is only one answer - lead an active social life! You need to get out into the world: go to the gym, take foreign language courses, get a second degree, turn some home hobby into a business, in general, do something interesting to you at least 2 times a week and outside the home.
How your social activity benefits you and your family:
- You will eliminate your emotional emptiness and will chew your man's brain out less. You will have other sources of energy and emotions. By the way, you will also lash out at your child less.
- The husband will not have a contrast - at work the girls are lively and interesting, but at home they are “homemade meatballs”. He himself has a wife with a gas burner under her butt, whose day is more interesting than many.
- If you still find a way to earn your personal money in this home mode, then many conflicts on the topic of women’s desires will disappear by themselves. You will earn your own money for boots, lipstick and much more, and there is nothing shameful in that.
- The issue of sexual boredom will not be so pressing. You are in the flow of life and social, you have an incentive to constantly keep yourself in shape. Other men are looking at you, and, therefore, your husband’s “hunter mode” will be turned on all the time in your direction. Conventionally, you should continue to look and feel as if you have not yet left the “big sex”.
- Plus, once again leaving the child with the father when you leave for your social affairs will only benefit them both!
You must remember that your life is first and foremost yours! You are not a wonderful addition to your husband and children, but an independent person! Your husband and children should see how greedy you are for knowledge, for impressions, loving yourself, valuing your life and your interests. And such an example is much more important to them than you simply being next to them 24 hours a day.
Love yourself and appreciate each other.
Tatiana Brain
Gen: 1 - 0 in favor of working women
One quickly gets used to good things - as a rule, after some time it “suddenly” turns out that household members are sure that mother is needed to make life easier, she exists for exactly the same thing as a washing machine, refrigerator, food processor and vacuum cleaner, only more (or less) depending on the character) is unpretentious in operation. Talking to household appliances, you understand, is not particularly interesting, and it’s somehow not customary to be interested in their opinion. Any requests to help with housework seem like a very annoying misunderstanding to the rest of the family - after all, the housewife has nothing else to do anyway! Further more - cleanliness begins to be perceived as “something that goes without saying” (read - you are unlikely to receive praise), but the slightest hint of its absence will immediately be put “in sight”. If this does not hit self-esteem, then it is not a means of raising it. It is easier for a working wife to “reach out” to the family - to explain that she (just like her husband and father) has a job, after which she may be tired, etc.
It's easy to be a housewife
Gone are the days when the role of a housewife meant daily hard labor, the need to get up before dawn and spin like a squirrel in a wheel until midnight. A modern woman has absolutely everything she needs to complete household chores quickly, easily and fun. Washing machines, microwave ovens, electronic dough mixers, blenders, food processors - all this will do the work for you, and you will only be the queen of the house, controlling this process. Of course, it won’t work out completely without effort, but in fact there is nothing wrong with homework if you organize it correctly.
5 mistakes when breaking up
Grooming: Draw 1 - 1
Housewives certainly have more opportunities and time to take care of themselves. At a minimum, they have full sleep, which many working women only dream of. Plus a pleasant opportunity not to force your own biorhythms and the opportunity to take care of your face and body without flinching because your husband might catch them in an unsightly state - you can safely spread white, blue or pink clay or “pupate” in cling film. A daily card to a fitness club costs much less, and there is no special excitement during classes at this time.
Working people have less free time and more external incentives to look perfect. The presence of colleagues and “competitors” mobilizes and motivates. The thought “Oh, what will they think” makes you move towards perfection.
Dependence on men: 1 - 0 in favor of working women
Men who are supporters of the so-called classical model of marriage, when the wife is barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen, by and large do not think about the happiness of their spouse, but about their own self-affirmation. Since his wife is at home, he is a fine fellow, a breadwinner, her “reliance” and support. And, by the way, she is in complete control of the situation - if something happens, she has nowhere to go (or there is no way to kick him out). That is why, at the slightest attempt on the part of a woman to somehow loosen the collar on her neck, he immediately begins to express his dissatisfaction. A working woman knows that even if something happens, she will not be lost even with her children. In a word, she has a choice, but a housewife often does not have such a choice.
Is it humiliating to be a housewife?
I often come across indignant exclamations from women here and there, not always even addressed to me. That the position of a woman is humiliating, especially if you are at home, if you are “just” a housewife, pathetic and dependent. And I understand that all this is written by women who have never been truly under the protection of a man, who have not tried to develop at home, in a family, with children. Those who have never been a real housewife, at most, sat at home watching TV or scrubbed the floors with hatred from morning to night. Therefore, it is difficult for them to understand how many opportunities there really are for a woman at home, and how privileged the position of homemaker can be.
A woman is one who is enjoyed
A woman is one through whom one enjoys. And a man is the one who enjoys. This is what men and women are called in Sanskrit. Therefore, many modern questions do not have answers that would suit everyone. Moreover, a woman’s whole body is wired to give. Don't believe me? Look in the mirror. A man receives a lot through a woman. And pleasure on different levels, and energy, and inspiration.
Women's nature is such that someone will always use her and her energy to achieve their goals and pleasure. That's what it's designed for.
But the purposes of such use, as well as the payment for it, can vary greatly. Therefore, it is customary to say that women are humiliated from the very beginning, that the world is unfair. And we “continue to be humiliated” - both today and 100-200 years ago, and even in a traditional society - it’s a nightmare. Women are simply used, exploited, decisions are made for them, they are discriminated against.
And for some reason, in the fight for equal rights, we are trying to change something that was not invented by us, instead of using what is given to us wisely. A woman will always be exploited by someone. It cannot be used by anyone or anything; it is too valuable and expensive a resource. But she has a choice. Either she is enjoyed by one man - and only one - that is, her husband. For his sake, she works at home, preserves her beauty for him, gives him her energy. If she is disgusted by this option, they say, what kind of lack of rights is this! - then other men will enjoy her. Many other and different men. I'm not even talking about those with whom she will enter into a relationship, but also about those for whom she will work.
Should I give my energy to someone else's uncle?
Have you ever thought that any enterprise is somehow based on feminine energy? Any successful leader has a muse - a wife, daughter, beloved woman or mother. But besides this, he has many employees who give their precious feminine energy every day to this very boss and his enterprise. Business grows with these forces. And it seems that everything is fair. Women give their time and energy and receive a salary in return. But isn't this too cheap and imprudent?
My mother, I hope, will forgive me for telling you a little about her. She worked for more than 20 years at the enterprise, in fact, together with the boss, they raised it from the ruins, and over time it began to flourish. How much health and strength my mother left there, how much time she spent on it. Surely few people know about this, but I saw how she sat at night, and how she spent weekends at work, and how she worried about her business more than about herself.
And she didn’t get married, and she accumulated illnesses, and for many years there was no time for hobbies. And what is it all for?
She worked all her life, even studied and worked at the institute. Her work experience was never interrupted, she approached her duties responsibly, and practically never went on sick leave (only once, when she was in an accident). She supported the common cause with all her soul (sometimes it seems to me even more than the leader himself).
And when I found out the size of her pension, the same one hard-earned over so many years, I wanted to cry - it wasn’t worth it at all. Although this is the maximum pension, the salary is white, with northern coefficients. But this is several times less than her usual salary. I don’t know how anyone can live on this, and I hope that we will always have the opportunity to help my mother.
Yes, my mother still cannot leave, although she has already worked for a year after her retirement. Because she invested so much into this enterprise, as if it were her brainchild too. But that's not true. This is not her business at all, not her child, not her family. She's just an employee, like everyone else. Who, perhaps, is appreciated a little more and who has been encouraged in various ways all these years, is a very profitable employee who devoted not only his strength to this business, but also his nerves and health. But still, just an employee.
As an employee, a woman is more profitable. She has a lot of complexes and experiences in her head that are easy to play with and manipulate. She wants to be good, and is afraid to remain unnecessary, and she must feed her children at any cost, especially if there is no husband, and she works more, and tries harder, and it is easy to manage her. She will work on weekends, in the evenings, and on vacation. This will also invest subtle feminine power into the enterprise. And without this power, nothing can grow or exist in this world.
To whom and “how much” should I give it?
Women who do not want to be “exploited” by their husband, do not want to obey him and give him their strength, in the end they still give it all away - to absolutely strangers. After all, they still have to obey - not just one husband, but several other men. The head of a department, the director, the owner of the enterprise - at every place of work.
Isn't this the greatest self-deception? Not wanting to adapt to one man, a husband, we have to adapt to many others.
Are we giving ourselves away too cheaply, to whom and why? And all only because we want independence from one man - our own husband, whom we once chose, looked for, with whom we are closer than with other men in many ways, from whom we even give birth to children. It’s somehow strange, we don’t really choose our bosses, but we find the strength to endure them and adapt.
Yes, the Lord created us in such a way that the energy of pleasure would come into this world through us. It is useless to fight this fact, with your nature, trying to become someone who enjoys others. Our happiness comes to us exactly this way - when we can give love, care and pleasure to our loved ones. And everything material comes to us through our husband - if we allow this to happen, if we really spend our feminine power within the family. But you can achieve everything with your own labor, giving away for nothing what is very expensive. We choose where to invest it and how, the results will be different.
Every woman sells herself and her strength, so to speak. The only question is to whom and for how much. And I'm not talking about material things like fur coats and diamonds. Believe me, it's too cheap too. A worthy and adequate price for a woman is complete protection from her only and loving spouse, a home, family and children, and the opportunity to remain herself, without wasting herself on all sorts of nonsense that will turn into dust over time.
For me, it’s better to obey one man whom you chose, whom you love, who gave you children, to work for him with both soul and body, than to give yourself to various strangers and other people’s projects.
Money and salary do not compensate even a hundredth of what we give in return.
It is better to massage the feet of one - your beloved and only one, learn to communicate with him, than to adapt to dozens of different men, betray yourself in this, periodically “kissing” strangers on the butt for profit, giving yourself completely to those who will never appreciate it .
Energy as an investment in your own future
If our energy is created in order to give it away and make others happy, then we should not try to change this fact, we just need to think about how and to whom to direct it.
It is not beneficial for our world for female energy to belong to only one man. The world will lose so many responsible hard workers in the person of women, men will become stronger, women will not need so many things to fill the emptiness inside, many modern inventions will not be needed, the same kindergartens, and technical progress will clearly slow down, as will purchasing activity. Because all this is not necessary for happiness.
I was created to be enjoyed. So let only one man enjoy - my lawful and beloved husband. Why resist this? Moreover, this is the only way he can become successful in this world. It is better to voluntarily take your place than to wait until it is shown to you - persistently and repeatedly. It’s better to give everything voluntarily to someone who deserves it than to wait for strangers to shake it out of you. It is better to give him energy and rejoice in his victories together than to fight with him, demand high results, while pouring all the most valuable things down the drain.
And in conclusion, I would like to share one monologue by Brigitte Bardot. You know her, right? Millions of men dreamed about her, she starred in many films, received recognition, and realized herself. It would seem, what else could you dream about? But what is she saying now?
“When I watch one of my old films now, I spit in my soul and immediately turn off the TV. How low and vile I acted!
The apotheosis of human happiness is marriage. Every time I see a woman with her husband and children, I ask myself: Why am I deprived of this grace?!
While visiting Muslim countries, I was amazed by their women: at first glance, they are “shrouded” and “not free,” but watching, you understand that they have achieved the female happiness that each of us dreams of. Their men extol them, they are full of respect and awe, they smile and chirp near the most expensive stores. Their oriental, unearthly beauty children run around the pavilions, and husbands stand with a bunch of bags from Tiffany and Chopard and constantly call their wives “habibi” with a smile - in their language it means something like, “dear”, “ beloved” - and piercing sadness passes through the memory into the very heart.
No one has ever respected me half as much as they respect them, I thought. I would like to return everything and settle here, under the auspices of a loving husband, and have children. But now I live with a cat and a dog, who remember me when they are hungry.”
And yes, she is talking about those very “humiliated and unhappy” women in Muslim countries. I saw their eyes, there was an ocean of serenity and an incredible amount of feminine power in them.
While we are here worrying about them, the poor things, they sincerely worry about us - defenseless, misled, empty and unhappy women who have fallen victims of equality.
In Malaysia, for example, I tried to photograph a beautiful woman from afar, her husband almost stared at me and demanded that the photo be deleted.
Terrible events and cruelty happen everywhere; there is no point in picking out isolated cases and saying that this is the case everywhere, and the traditional way of life is to blame. In most cases, it is traditions that are designed to protect women, including from themselves. In our "advanced society" women are treated much worse. They are used for advertising purposes by being placed half-naked on banner boards, are judged by their appearance when hiring, and sometimes openly demand sexual relations in the workplace. In our families, domestic violence and other terrible things that I don’t want to talk about here and now are much more developed.
As a result, everyone decides for themselves how to manage their power and to whom to give it. We choose our own path, choose how to value ourselves and to whom and for how much to sell. The main thing is not to sell yourself short, because the energy of female power is not limitless. But no matter what each of us chooses, she will be right for herself in any case. After all, only she can decide how to treat herself and how to apply herself in this world, like an auction, where female strength is needed by everyone around her. Although few people understand its real cost and value.
Children: 1 - 0 in favor of housewives
Children of mothers who stay at home feel more protected. Mom probably won’t miss the matinee, will carve out half an hour (or even an hour) to tell a fairy tale, and will listen, without rushing, to what the baby wants to tell her. She will not be nervous about the fact that she will be dissatisfied with another sick leave “to care for the child” and will always be aware of all the child’s “affairs” - who she is friends with, who she quarrels with, what she is worried about. For working mothers, due to a lack of free time, problems of life support, rather than upbringing, usually come to the fore. The child is fed, dressed, shod - and okay, emotional communication is postponed for the weekend. On Saturday you need to wash, iron on Sunday, cook something delicious - and before you know it, the next week begins.
Girls, tell me: in your opinion, is being a housewife good or bad?
Damn girls, I'm at a loss how to react
. Being a housewife is good or bad.
And here’s the thing: Today, when I was expecting my youngest child with karate, I met an old friend of mine. When she found out that I don’t work, but sit at home and take care of the house and take care of the children, she “shit” me sooooooo much (sorry for the language).
Telling me that I couldn’t live like that, that I was a dependent and was degrading as a person and as a woman. That in the eyes of others, a stay-at-home mom is a chicken with a chicken brain. And that apart from the kitchen and the rag, she is not interested in anything, etc., etc.
Of course, at first I was stunned by such rudeness towards me and my family
. In this way, she also humiliated my husband (a quite successful and self-sufficient person), saying that it was he who found such beauty in me (and we have been together for almost 15 years), since I sit at home and do nothing. Well, I learned a lot of other interesting things about our family.
And this despite the fact that she “naturally” works, she was married 2 times and now lives with a “friend” and is not entirely happy with her new husband, she has one child (a girl who is already 10 years old). Of course, I was offended and did not make excuses, but ended our conversation as quickly as possible.
Naturally, I was uncomfortable. And then I began to think about where I could “shove” work, given my life schedule, and my schedule is as follows.
There are two children, 4 and 10 years old, and a husband, respectively.
Dad takes the eldest child to school in the morning, and I take the youngest child to kindergarten.
At 13:00 (sometimes at 14:00) I pick up my eldest at school (5 times a week)
3 times a week I take him to karate at 16:00 and until 18:00 (at this time I go to the gas station and to the shops or just sit and wait for him (while learning English)
Twice a week at 16:00 and until 18:00 I take my youngest to karate.
At the same time, the days do not coincide with the eldest.
The eldest goes to English these days. language to a tutor (luckily on his own), but you still need to make sure that he leaves the house, etc.
In the evening we need to pick up the youngest from the garden. Take a walk with them, check their homework with the older 4th grader.
Making reports and a “project” together is now fashionable in schools, so that children and parents make reports together.
Pay some attention to yourself and your husband. And in the end, just take a break from everything, read a book or take up a hobby.
As a result, I have relatively free time during the work week from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m.
. These days I try to cook food, wash and iron and clean the house
. Despite the fact that I now also have a dacha, where we go for the weekend.
And accordingly, everything needs to be prepared and packed. Food and things, etc.
So the question is, where should I fit the work?
If you go to work now, then naturally the grandmothers will take the children (we have two, thank God, but they all have their own problems and affairs,
and also my health doesn’t quite allow me to pick up my children often, since I have to travel everywhere by transport)
. The eldest from school will also have to travel on his own (of course, he will only be in favor, and he sometimes travels alone if I am unwell or I do not have time to pick him up).
But you need to go by minibus for about 10 minutes and then cross 2 roads (quite busy,
True, there is a traffic light, but there are a lot of fools everywhere) and it’s a 10-minute walk.
I don’t want to go for a small salary, but they won’t take me for a good one, since I haven’t worked for 8 years
. And I worked as a quite successful sales manager.
This is where the question arises. Do I need this?
If my husband is completely satisfied with life (he never reproaches me and is glad that I’m at home), then we can always go on vacation
when my husband is free or we have the opportunity to leave without him,
the children are fed and shod, the house is in order, etc.
. It seems that I’m not degenerating, I can quite support a conversation on any topic and I’m quite literate, I’m interested in many things
. I have a hobby, I embroider with beads, I am interested in tourism and different countries and play sports (when I have time).
And are all working women soooo happy with their jobs that they consider all housewives to be “chickens”?
So then I have a question: “Is it good or bad to be at home and not work?”
Ability to manage your time: 1 - 0 in favor of housewives
This is where housewives, of course, will give the “workhorses” a head start. It’s great to realize that how your day is structured depends entirely on you. If you want, call your lover, if you want, take up a hobby, if you want, wander around an empty supermarket with a cart. You can even look out the window and enjoy watching the sun slowly creep up across the sky, then also slowly fall down - the day seems endlessly long, and is not “compressed” to 8 working hours a day, when both morning and evening are full. for artificial lighting are perceived absolutely equally.
And to you, our dear readers, which way of life is closer and why?
