How can you forget the person you work with and gave birth to?

How to forget a friend

Parting with dear people is always difficult, but life is such that not everyone we meet along the path of life stays with us forever. Sometimes even the closest friends do things that are very difficult to forgive. Then how to forget a friend ? We will talk about this below. There is no specific time frame for psychological recovery. Each person needs an individual period to forget grievances

. AnyDayLife has selected several tips that will help you quickly get rid of mental burden.

Don't hide from life

. Look for new hobbies for yourself. Instead of overeating on chocolate and scouring the Internet in search of melancholy music, it would be nice to take a dance class. There you will not only take your mind off your worries and learn to control your body, but also make new acquaintances

Make yourself delicious breakfasts

. Eat cottage cheese, porridge, drink juices. This diet will relieve heaviness in the stomach and improve your mood. Learn to cook original dishes - it will take your time and reward you with extra experience in cooking.

Play some sports

. Running, swimming or gym. Physical activity will greatly help relieve psychological stress, and will also make your figure fit.

Set yourself up

. "I'm too good to suffer like this." Raising your self-esteem will give you an impetus, your keen interest in life will awaken again and you will very soon understand how to forget the person who was so dear to you.

Don't get stuck in your comfort zone

. Go for walks every day and breathe fresh air. It's good for you to treat yourself to ice cream. This will give you endorphins - natural hormones of happiness, which are the best antidepressant.

Release your energy

. Don’t suppress negative thoughts, don’t be afraid to feel sorry for yourself.

Do yoga

. Yoga will calm your nerves, give you peace of mind and help clear your mind.

Go shopping

. Shopping is a great medicine. And you deserve to treat yourself to something new. At the same time, it is advisable to buy things that go beyond your style. Change your hairstyle or hair color.

Don't turn away from your friends

. If you have lost one friend, this does not mean that there are no others left. Take a walk with them in the park, go to the movies. Do not forget that life has not stopped, so you need to ensure its happy continuation. Understand that there are no irreplaceable people.

Don't hold evil in your heart

. Gloomy thoughts about the person who offended you will not bring you any joy. Mentally let the person go, then life will become easier.

Set a goal for yourself

. Do something that scares you. Take a ride on a scary ride and pick up a spider. This will distract your thoughts and give you confidence.

Make a list

. In one column, write down all the negative things that parting with your friend brought you, and in the other, draw positive conclusions. For example, “I feel so bad without his support” - “But now I know all the sad songs, I watched all the films about friendship and went in for sports.” “He betrayed our friendship” - “But now I have experience, and I know what to do in such a difficult situation.” You will understand that there are positive aspects in everything.

Know that another person

, communication with whom will bring a lot of joy, and your friendship will be even stronger and stronger.

How to forgive and forget former friends?

Hello, Asya!

The pain and resentment that are so noticeable in your letter certainly make your life less happy! And you seem to have plenty of reasons for happiness. You are married, you have succeeded as a woman, you have children.

I know from myself that maternity leave is not always filled with joyful and sunny days. There are also states of emptiness, depression, and decreased confidence that you can do something else in this life besides taking care of your family and children. The feeling of one’s own abandonment is very often accompanied by memories of past losses, failures, unfulfilled hopes and plans.

Of course, part of this can be attributed to the woman’s postpartum depression, which usually worsens a year and a half after the birth itself. This is due to the loss of social activity, a feeling of loss of control over one’s life, and the connection of one’s own interests and desires with the needs and desires of children. But this usually passes, especially when the child’s development enters the stage of active knowledge of the world - he begins to walk, hear and listen, and try to establish independent contacts with the world around him. Usually, the creative component of the mother’s soul helps to escape from sad thoughts and fill life with new meanings, which helps socially active individuals who need constant contact with others, and not just limited by the world of their own family, to survive this period.

But this is only part of the problem. In your case, it seems that there are some other reasons for this state - memories of past periods of your own life. Since your memories are associated with the losses of those close to you - this is the environment in which you grew up, and friends who “disappeared” from your life in such a way that it resembles betrayal and is associated with a loss of trust in the world in which you are accustomed to existing, then we can assume that your current environment - husband, relatives, environment, including psychological and emotional, does not give you a feeling of confidence not only in yourself and your future, but also in the future of your children and the relationship itself. It seems that you lack support from people close to you. And this insufficiency is looking for “proof” that this has always been and will always be the case in your life - memories kindly betray the “betrayal” and indifference of former friends, the house in which everything was done with love was remade by others at their own discretion. Not only were all these early events once traumatic for you and not completely “released” from your life, but also their indifference and coldness, which is so noticeable in small towns, does not give you the opportunity to let go of past experiences, bringing them back again and again in memories.

Of course, it would be simple to advise you to let go of the past and try to live in the present, enjoying every day and new events in the life of both you and your family members. But I understand that without understanding the reasons for such “retention” of traumatic events in memory, without working through this very past, it will not be so easy to part with it. Therefore, I would recommend that, if you have such an opportunity, you seek help in this process from specialists in your city or on the Internet. It is possible that by working on situations that are so important to you in today's life, you will be able to better understand yourself, understand your needs in the present, let go, forgive and connect the past to your own experience.

Take care of yourself, Asya, and your emotional and mental balance. You still have many happy moments ahead that you may miss by clinging to the painful past.

Love to you, understanding and calm balance in life!

Best regards, Elena Gladkova

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Rating 5.00 (7 Votes)

How can you forget the person you work with and gave birth to?

Marina, hello!

Unfortunately, there really is no universal remedy that will help you forget your past and live happily, without thinking about anything. And it is not possible to quickly forget the person with whom you were in a relationship. And even more so - from whom there is a child. One way or another, you will remember him all your life.

You can just remember in different ways. In one case - to blame for offending. Engage in self-criticism and think about why everything happened the way it did. Feel sorry for yourself and feel like a victim of circumstances. Get hung up on all this and not notice another man who could make you happy.

Or you can remember with gratitude for a child who will make your life more joyful and fulfilling. With gratitude for leaving immediately and fooling around for another 10 years, leading to nervous breakdowns and hysterics. And with gratitude for giving you the opportunity to meet a man who will love, appreciate, respect and care for you. And who will not need to understand himself about whether he needs you or not. And who will love your child as if he were his own and will never give up on him.

In your case, to stop constantly remembering the past, you need time and a little work on yourself. And first of all, you need to work through your grievances against this male colleague. Because most often they hold grudges and some unfulfilled expectations in the past. When you wanted one thing to happen, but in the end you got something completely different.

You can work through grievances in different ways. You can write a letter to your offender, but you don’t need to give him this letter. After writing, immediately tear it up and throw it in the trash. So, in a letter, write about everything that you would like to express to him, without holding back your emotions and expressions. Write about what you expected from him, but he could not give you what you need. About everything that he did to you and what you remember. At the end of the letter, write: “I let go of all my grievances! I am free!".

If one letter does not help completely, write as many as it takes until you feel as if there is an inner emptiness, and there is nothing more you would like to say or add on this topic. Such letters have the effect of speaking to someone and significantly relieve the level of internal tension.

You can look on the Internet and choose ways or methods of working with grievances that are right for you. But, if you want to weaken your memories, don’t let this question go to chance.

And think about this: you can’t change the past, right? There everything turned out exactly the way it turned out. And perhaps only after a while you will be able to understand that it was for the better. Therefore, stop feeling sorry for yourself and constantly chewing on the topic of those relationships. To do this, arrange one evening for yourself, when you remember everything, analyze what mistakes were made, what exactly you were wrong about, thank the universe for this lesson and close this topic.

After all, in fact, every day you have a choice - either get stuck on the past and every time you meet this colleague, blush, turn pale, frown and turn into a gray bundle of nerves. Or decide that the past remains in the past. That you are not God or an ideal person and could have made a mistake in some way. You forgive yourself all your mistakes, accept yourself and begin to live according to a new program, in which there is a lot of joy and happiness.

And since you have to meet your colleague, imagine him in some funny way. And the funnier and more absurd, the better. And then, seeing him, you will not think about the past and suffer, but will laugh internally with all your heart.

Try changing your focus. You are a young, beautiful, healthy woman. You have your little happiness - your baby. Learn to find joy in every day in some little things. And then you will definitely attract a worthy man into your life.

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Rating 4.83 (3 Votes)

Get rid of heartache

The breakup of a relationship does not pass without a trace, and the woman experiences disappointment and pain for a long time. Memory slips in beautiful and happy moments from life with my ex-husband. You feel the urge to hide in your shell and close yourself off from everyone, be alone and cry into your pillow.

You won't be able to completely forget your ex-spouse and your married life, but you can get rid of the heartache that torments and eats you from the inside. To do this, you must rid yourself of nervous tension, anxiety, and most importantly, not engage in masochism and not dream of your former life with your ex-husband. Think that you have entered a new stage in life, where you can meet a person with whom you will spend the rest of your life in love and harmony. There is no need to seek meetings with your ex-spouse.

But if your meetings do not depend on your desire and will take place, for example, because of his communication with children, then immediately establish a relationship format with him. You can behave like friends, or more formally, but both of you and he should behave this way.

If you constantly think about how to forget your ex-husband, then you will never forget him. Try not to think about it at all.
Do not even entertain the thought of resuming the relationship. Let go of the situation and your husband too. Don't cling to the past.
In order not to think about your ex-husband, have more fun, visit interesting places, what you like.
Even out of curiosity, don’t be interested in how your spouse lives, don’t reopen your wounds. Try to break off all contacts or reduce communication to a minimum because of the children.
A new relationship will help you get rid of the past and forget your husband.
Try not to make trouble after a divorce, don’t sort things out, and don’t spoil your mood.
Interesting books, movies and TV shows will help you forget and get distracted. And to quickly get rid of accumulated tears, watch and read sentimental novels.
When you calm down, think about why you broke up with your husband, so that there will be no more such mistakes in a new relationship.
After the divorce, give your husband all his personal belongings so that they do not catch your eye and do not bring back memories. We also advise you to remove general photos away so as not to see yourself next to him.

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An attempt to forget an ex-husband, according to psychologists, takes a strong second place, after such events as if the husband died or went to prison (such data are provided by authoritative psychological studies that should be trusted).

The main reason for such destructive power lies not in the very fact of her husband’s departure, but in the fact that the woman will have to adapt to a new way of life, which will undoubtedly force her to spend a lot of moral energy.

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How to forget your ex-husband and start a new life

After all, it is quite physically exhausting. How to forget your ex-husband and still remain yourself? This question arises for almost all women who have divorced or been abandoned by their husbands.

The second factor influencing morale is the partial departure of the husband. This aspect slightly weakens the condition, but for a given duration it will put the woman in a state of some kind of “suspense,” tension and uncertainty, which, naturally, will cause anxiety, which is very capable of “fraying” the remaining nerves. If there was true love, then this is almost impossible. In addition, the worst stress factor is a long-acting factor, but you can still resort to the common expression that “time heals.”

You can return to the situation that marks the period during which the husband is absent from life. If this happened a few weeks, months or even a year ago. Your concern can be completely understood - in such a short time it is almost impossible to rebuild your life and forget your spouse.

During this time, you should try to analyze the reasons for his departure, possible mistakes in family life that led to such a misfortune. If a lot of time has passed - more than a year, and sometimes several years, then you should not remember one man all your life. Still, there is only one life and it goes on. You can already try to look for someone new and loved.

I can’t forget my ex-husband, what should I do?

In most cases, when a divorce is of a so-called “civilized” nature, many women experience such a breakup much more strongly than if the breakup occurred due to, for example, infidelity or some other scandal. But on the other hand, if no psychological trauma was inflicted on either the husband or the wife, then perhaps only good memories may remain in the memory, which can be synthesized in a relationship with another man.

Reducing the degree of certain uncertainty in the relationship with your ex-husband can cause anxiety and have an extremely strong impact on the nervous system - and there is no escape from this, you just have to wait until it goes away on its own. You can, of course, attend various psychological trainings, where competent specialists can help in such a difficult situation, but an individual approach to each problem is not found as often as we would like.

In order to survive a divorce and not torment yourself with the question of how to forget your ex-husband, you should activate your new life position. You should try to start building a new life, which may well turn out to be much happier than the previous one. This doesn't happen very often, but it does happen. And as they say, “an attempt is not torture.” In a relationship with a new man, you should determine a new format of relationship that will suit both parties. But to a greater extent, it needs to be created in such a way that it suits and is comfortable specifically for a woman who recently experienced a breakup. From this point of view, the new man will have to try to adapt to her, thereby showing all his most serious intentions.

How to forget your husband - advice from a psychologist

The first step is to get rid of old thoughts. Surely you remember only good things and think that all the quarrels occurred on your initiative. Women tend to take the blame. But this is the first mistake a woman makes after a divorce. Think about how much trouble your husband has caused you. Take the blame off yourself; in any divorce, both spouses are to blame.

Next, start your life again. This means not only getting rid of various negative thoughts, but also changing your lifestyle. Psychologists in this case advise you to fulfill your old dream. Moreover, one that could not be performed in the presence of her husband. For example, you have always dreamed of a bedroom in red colors, so take it and renovate it. Absolutely any changes will only be beneficial. If you've dreamed of visiting some exotic country all your life, drop everything and go. Work and home will not go away, but you can become so depressed that even experienced psychologists are unlikely to help you later.

Answer yourself this question: how long have you been to a beauty salon or fitness room? Probably a long time ago. My husband took up too much of his time, and it was a waste of money; it was better to buy my husband a new shirt. Surely these are your thoughts too. So now, you shouldn’t think about your husband. Now all the funds and time are only for you and the children. Give yourself an unexpected hair color and an unusual haircut. It has been proven that by changing her image, a woman changes her attitude towards many things.

The next step to forgetting your ex-husband is to search for new sensations and achievements. Sign up for some classes or dancing. And if you still don't have a driver's license, I advise you to go to driving school. Those emotions and adrenaline are comparable only to a parachute jump. By the way, maybe you’ll decide on it too?

In other words, in order to find the answer to the question of how to forget your husband, you should reconsider your life again. You may end up with a lot more after your divorce than you did when you were married. Don't immediately rush to look for a new man. Flirt with everyone and accept courtship signs from everyone who makes them. Go on dates, have fun, relax and remember that not only you are suffering, but also your ex-husband.

Speaking of my ex-husband. Many women are sure that only women experience divorce or separation. But that's not true. On the contrary, 33% of men after a divorce try to replace the loss of their wife with alcohol. There are also frequent suicides. Men want to remarry much faster, and even marriage agencies are turning to them. And all because, living for many years with the same woman, they develop an ideal, literally point by point. Arriving at the agency, the man begins to list what his future wife must have. Moreover, often all these transfers lie in the merits of the ex-wife.