Tired of marriage and husband: reasons for emotional burnout of women in the family, advice from psychologists

Why is my wife annoying?

In this situation, the woman is looking for the culprits. It is important to understand the essence of a man. He gets tired of monotony. By nature, men are polygamous. Therefore, if the partners do not try to refresh the relationship in any way, the man, in search of variety, goes deeper into work or looks for new emotions “on the side.”

Very often, after living for many years in marriage with one woman, men begin to “look to the left”

The main reasons why a husband is tired of his wife:

The wife “drank.” Men do not like to be constantly reproached or taught about life. You want to run away from such a woman without looking back. Moreover, a woman in such a situation may think that the truth is on her side, and the reproaches are justified. But it’s worth thinking about whether the husband has really done something wrong that he needs to be nagged. So close to divorce. After all, every patience comes to an end sooner or later. Even strong love can be destroyed by constantly repeated reproaches.
A woman’s perception of a man as a “wallet of money.” A man has always been perceived as a breadwinner, and a woman is a housewife, a mother, responsible for the comfort in the house. But if a woman asks her provider for money too often, he may get tired of it. The way out of this situation is to send her to work.
Misunderstanding of the wife. Lack of understanding between partners destroys relationships and marriages. You can discuss the accumulated problems over a calm dialogue, for example, during dinner with a glass of wine.

Tired of marriage and husband: what is the reason?

Before marriage, the fairer sex develops a positive opinion about family life, which is caused by a positive reaction to the actions of their partner.
Moreover, this is also true for those couples who begin to conflict before marriage. Meetings, one-on-one conversations, walks together, living together in a civil union - everything is part of the process that shapes the future family.

Initially, the couple is absolutely compatible, as they try to complement each other’s feelings and emotions. The main thing is that the relationship maintains the proper level of internal comfort.

For example, a woman perceives her partner’s detachment in solving pressing problems as a manifestation of fundamental reliability. And the man experiences absolute satisfaction, believing that his temperament completely suits her.

Such a wife usually tries to take care of her husband, taking on most of the responsibility.

And when children are born, the woman, as her preoccupation with business increases, begins to look at the world differently: her husband’s behavior no longer seems correct to her.

This creates a conflict of interest, which often develops into quarrels and functional discord within the family.

You should take a closer look at your partner’s character at the beginning of your journey in order to avoid unpleasant surprises in the future.

He doesn't pay attention to me!

Women like male attention when their problems are listened to and help is offered. But what to do if you come home from work tired, hoping to relax, and your beloved reproaches you for inattention? A man by nature does not focus on details.

He is attracted to more global affairs. He may not notice the changed shade of his favorite hair or a new blouse. This happens not because he doesn’t love her, but because he is tired, carried away by other thoughts, or perceives his woman as a whole, and not in terms of little things.

A lot of men admit that they are tired of their wife for the simple reason that she constantly nags them.

The nature of the female gender is different. The girl tries to look good for her man, but he did not appreciate her impulse. Selfish nature requires more and more attention; your thoughts should be occupied with it. But due to work and fatigue, you may simply not have time for this. Resentments arise, reproaches appear. And sooner or later the husband comes to the conclusion that his wife is tired of her grievances. The man feels trapped. He perceives love from the side of the result, not the process.

And a woman needs to constantly feel loved, to see that she is being paid attention to. The result is that the wife is tired of her grievances. It's better to show her that she is dear to you. Give her small gifts throughout the year, not just on special occasions.

Symptoms of depression

The following signs indicate that you are tired of life:

Negative emotions (irritability, melancholy, fear) or complete indifference to everything predominate.
There is no point in any actions.
Constant boredom.
The world is seen in shades of grey.
It is difficult to concentrate, concentrate and think about something.
Favorite activities and hobbies are not pleasing.
There is no desire to communicate with people.
There is no interest in intimacy.
Physical weakness and discomfort in the body.
Fatigue, drowsiness, insomnia or poor sleep with nightmares.
Reluctance to get out of bed in the morning.
The emergence of thoughts of suicide.

If several points occur, then we can talk about a state of apathy. If most of the points are present, and they have been observed for more than two weeks, then this is real depression, which can develop into a prolonged one.

Common hobbies in the fight against household irritants

Try to delve deeper into his hobbies. This will help you better understand your spouse. Let's say, go fishing with him. It is possible that having understood all the intricacies, you yourself will become so involved that within a week you will be, choking with delight, telling your girlfriends that “the spinning rod of this brand is simply a plague!” and what exactly are you looking at?

It is very important that you and your husband have common hobbies. When people breathe “the same air,” it brings them so close that no small everyday irritants can stand in the way of your family well-being.

It will be useful to go on vacation together. Choose some quiet, but definitely picturesque place. The beauty of nature has a calming effect, and your subconscious will begin to perceive everything around you (including your spouse nearby) exclusively in a positive way.

Although the exact opposite option is also possible here. Relax separately. You can't even imagine how distance affects a person's attachment to something familiar.

After two weeks of separation, you will attack each other like hungry wolves (in a good way) and even if your spouse then causes complete destruction in the apartment because of the loss of your favorite team, this will not throw you off balance at all.

What are the consequences of ignoring life fatigue?

If nothing is done, then in advanced cases, the usual condition, when you are tired of problems and life, can develop into a neurotic disorder or a disease associated with psychosomatics. If you are depressed for a very long time, depression begins, which in some cases leads to suicide. This does not mean that any emotionally devastated soul is doomed to destruction. At best, there will simply be suicidal tendencies that do not lead to a desire to die. An apathetic state causes a lot of inconvenience and greatly spoils a full-fledged life. Because of it, it is impossible to work normally, communicate, do usual things, favorite hobbies and simply be happy. To bring pleasure back to life, you need to fight depression. First you need to understand why life gets boring. Only by identifying the cause can the problem be solved.

As a rule, one of four reasons leads to fatigue from life. In rare cases - all together. They are as follows:

Stress.
Is the most common source of this negative feeling. When faced with a stressful situation, a person usually feels depressed and helpless, as if he is being pulled in different directions. In such cases, psychologists advise trying to get rid of the source of worries and add variety to life.

"Black line".
Sometimes there are moments in life when one misfortune comes after another. Then it begins to seem that no methods work anymore, no matter how hard you try. This may contribute to the loss of hope for improvement. Because of this, there is a feeling of fatigue from existence. As experts say, you just need to survive such moments, endure them. If possible, you should try to solve problems that arise and please yourself with something.

Unfulfilled hopes and expectations.
Probably everyone wants to become someone, do something or receive something. Over time, the understanding comes that it is impossible to achieve your goal and everything does not go as in your dreams. For example, you can’t start your own business, you don’t like your current job, you’re tired of family life. If something doesn’t suit you, psychologists recommend starting to change it or adjust your view of these things.

Depression. This condition usually occurs due to excessively strong experiences. For example, divorce, unexpected job loss, death of a loved one, domestic violence, serious illness. Usually you cannot cope with depression on your own, so at the first sign of it you should immediately contact a competent specialist.

Once the cause has been identified, you need to start eliminating it. Recommendations from psychologists and life advice from ordinary people can help with this. This will be discussed further.

Advice from psychologists for women tired of family and marriage

Experts have something to share regarding maintaining a family atmosphere for many years:

If your partner doesn’t understand something, you need to explain it to him;
you should not make hasty decisions;
One of the best methods to avoid a quarrel is to not react to it.

Sometimes restraint and the ability to listen to a partner play a decisive role in maintaining connections. There is no need to wait for your husband to figure out the reasons for the problem. Without unnecessary hints, a woman should make it clear the reason for her dissatisfaction.

This should be included in the family charter as a rule. Each conflict has its own period of relevance. Usually it does not last more than two days, after which most problematic situations are resolved in a simple way.

The methodology for strengthening family relationships does not necessarily encourage women to do what psychology advises. These rules are advisory in nature. After all, communication is an individual concept, and each couple has its own parameters of satisfaction.

Get rid of sources of stress

Work, self-realization, relationships with family, friends and partners are the areas that most often lead to stress. It is better to eliminate these sources of negative emotions immediately. It is clear that it is unlikely that you will be able to say goodbye to them completely, but you can reduce the negativity.

It's not easy to decide to change, but it's necessary. They form character, strengthen and develop. “I'm tired of life! What to do?" - clients ask psychologists. Experts recommend taking the situation into your own hands and starting to change it.

If you don't like your job, you need to find another one. It may bring in less money, but your nerves will remain intact. Does your husband beat you? It’s better to leave him than to endure such an attitude. Don't have the courage to move away from your parents? But if you do this, you won’t have to constantly endure humiliation from them and comparisons with older children. Situations may vary. The main thing is to start doing something and change your life.

Change the scenery

Almost all people are tired of monotonous life. Everything is already familiar and known, so it begins to seem that nothing new will happen. There will be no prospects and the future will not get better. This is where personal dissatisfaction with life arises. In such cases, psychologists recommend changing the environment in order to relax, get new impressions and recharge with positive emotions. This is very good advice. By following it, you can significantly improve your mood.

If you can take a break from work, you can go on a trip. But time should be spent outside the hotel walls. A great idea would be to visit natural beauty (deserts, mountains, steppes, jungles), castles, palaces or unique national holidays (Venice Carnival, German Oktoberfest, Hindu Holi - the festival of colors) with an experienced guide.

If you don’t have extra finances, you don’t have to go on an expensive trip. You can visit local history and art museums, antique souvenir shops, national gardens, and parks within the city. Yes, it’s elementary - go to the beach, cinema, swimming pool, bowling alley and other entertainment venues. The main thing is to visit a new place.

Change your daily routine

If you are tired of everything, you simply need to change your life. The vicious circle “work - home” does not bode well. Even if you really like your profession and everything is fine in your family, it is still advisable to periodically change your activities. You can try using the day differently. First you should start a diary. Every day you need to write down all your actions and the time when they start and end. Psychologists recommend keeping a diary for at least a week. This way you can more effectively analyze how much time is spent on what. After this, you need to ask yourself some important questions. What changes would you like to make to your day? Which actions are effective and which are not? What takes too much time, and what can you avoid altogether? Depending on the answers, you need to change your routine.

For example, you can change your sleep schedule to take into account biorhythms, determine the most convenient time for meals, plan purchases in advance, watch less TV and surf the Internet so that you can do other things. The day will become more varied if you set aside hours or a few minutes for regular walks, visiting clubs, museums or entertainment venues. It is useful to set aside half an hour every day that will be spent exclusively on yourself. It may be advisable to reconsider the way you travel and get to work not by car or bus, but by bicycle or on foot. This is useful and in some cases much faster.

That is, in order to avoid the thought that you are tired of your dull life, you need to get rid of the routine, reduce the negativity and add more effective rest to your routine. If several points are incompatible with working hours, it is quite possible to find a compromise. If you can’t organize even half of the planned changes, then this is a serious reason to think about changing jobs. Do we work to live or live to work?

Is it possible to prevent burnout?

No one knows how or when burnout will happen, or if it will happen at all. How will a parent perceive the birth and further growth of a child or children in the family and how will they function...

A lot depends on the presence of true love between spouses, which, in my opinion, is possible with mutual sympathy, mental health or psycho-emotional maturity of both spouses, which can be determined by their awareness, responsibility, functionality, independence.

Photo source: sibmama.ru

I liked the following definition of a healthy loving relationship - a relationship of equality, intimacy and reciprocity.

Fatigue may accumulate in the families of such spouses, which they can quickly notice, prompt each other and promptly take measures to restore their parental capacity. In such families, relationships are built on the principles of cooperation, like-mindedness, mutual assistance and interchangeability. Unfortunately, these are happy and rare exceptions.

And for most other, ordinary families, I recommend initially conducting an educational program on emotional burnout among parents, from Wikipedia to articles by famous and not so famous authors. Those who are more interested or anxious, as well as perfectionists, can find and read books or take various courses and trainings on this issue, for example, by Lyudmila Petranovskaya.

I think it is very important to maintain contact with colleagues in the workshop - other parents, both personally acquainted and virtual ones in various forums and groups on social networks. Such communication will help you recognize your capabilities, mistakes, and condition, including the concept of burnout, because not many people understand what is happening to them; for a long time they can explain their lack of resources by any reasons, just not related to children, and time is running out. And the later we realize it, the more difficult the difficulties and the longer it will take to solve them.

“I’m tired of the child, what should I do? I want to finally rest! When will there be a break? When will it be easier? These are the thoughts of millions of mothers. And you can't blame them for that. It can be really difficult with children. Up to a year, the child requires constant presence and completely dissolves in the mother. It's very hard. After a year, the child begins to run everywhere, is interested in everything, and parents have to accompany him even within the apartment. This is also difficult. In addition, whims do not stop after a year, as many mothers hope, but only intensify. After all, firstly, teeth come out. And secondly, the child is already beginning to understand that he can influence this world and is trying to do so.

Of course, it is difficult to stay at home with a child, especially difficult for mothers, since they are with their child 24 hours a day. And then mothers have a strong desire to take a break from the child, hand him over to someone, give him away, and finally go to work. A free mother is a dream! And many do just that. They send their child to kindergarten at the age of two (and some even earlier) and take care of themselves/go to work/relax. And everything seems to be in order, the child is under supervision, the mother is free and happy. From kindergarten the child goes to school, as expected, his mother puts him in several more sections so that he does not sit idle. And then real freedom begins.

But sometime later, a year later, the mother discovers in horror that she really doesn’t know anything about her child. For some reason, he doesn’t consult with her at all, doesn’t take her into account and doesn’t listen. For him, friends, TV, the Internet or another adult become his authority. But not her, not my mother. And then the real problems begin.

Mom suddenly no longer needs her freedom, nor work, nor the rest that she once craved so much. Resentment fills her entire being and the thought constantly swirls: “What did I miss?” And she missed the time, even when her child was small and so needed her attention. Then my mother was free, now my mother has become unhappy.

Children, even before they are one year old, become very attached to the person who is next to them all the time. And they really need this person. Therefore, when you run away from a little man who is crying because he wants to be held in your arms, you launch a boomerang that will definitely come back to you. It will return with disrespect and misunderstanding on the part of the child. Even if not now and not even in five years. And even later. But life doesn’t end today.

This is how mothers take their heads when their children in adolescence begin to drink, smoke, get involved with bad company, get into debt, start gambling for money or become hostage to virtual games. They do not know, . Believe me, all this is due to a lack of your attention and your love, starting from early childhood. And your prohibitions and screams will be met with hostility, no morality will help you return your child. Only undivided attention and love on your part will help, which the child did not receive when you became a free mother.

Therefore, now, while your child is still small, when you so often think: “I’m tired of the child. What should I do?” when you dream of a vacation, don’t make the biggest mistake in your life! No one says that you should lay down your whole life for the sake of a child, sacrificing your health, hobbies and work. Of course not! Moms definitely need a break, rest, a breath of fresh air. But it is better to do this gently, painlessly for the baby. Delegate responsibilities to your husband, ask your mother, mother-in-law, and other relatives to help you look after the child. And dedicate this time to your recovery, both physical and moral.

When the time comes to go to work and send your child to kindergarten (read the article ““), spend time with your child after work, on weekends, show him that you love him and need him.

In the meantime, the child is very small, try to concentrate on pleasant moments that will never happen again. The first smile, the first word, the first steps. The words “I love you, mom!” All this is worth a lot and brings great happiness! Seeing how your child grows, how he learns to live - this outweighs all the sleepless nights, whims and difficulties.

And once you have decided to have a child, remember that you will never become a completely free mother, but many years later, when you are asked if you want to become completely free, you will answer without hesitation that no! And if now you really want freedom, this means that this is a period of time when you are very tired. But believe me, it will pass soon!

With love, Yulia Kravchenko

- Mom, I'm bored! - Alenka whines. “Draw,” Marina suggests wearily. “I don’t want to draw,” draws out my daughter. - Mom, I have nothing to do. Marina wants to say: “I’m so tired of you!” – but bites his tongue. “I’m tired,” she thinks. “I’m tired of constantly coming up with new activities for the children, separating them, cleaning up after them and wiping their snot!” I don't have the strength for all this anymore. I'm tired of this baby. I want to lie down and lie with my eyes closed. About three years. And so that everyone remains silent." - Mom, what should I do? – Alenka is indignant. - Well, mom?! “Bring “Dunno,” sighs Marina. - We'll read.

First of all, it is important to understand that your problem is not exceptional. All parents get tired of their children. Caring for children is a serious and energy-intensive job that requires all your strength, both mental and physical. Only many parents are embarrassed to admit it. But a surgeon who has completed an operation, or an artist who has finished working on a painting, is not ashamed of his fatigue. In this sense, it is very good that you found the strength and courage to admit: I am tired of my work as a mother.

Here are a few “pro” parenting secrets. They, of course, will not completely relieve you of the feeling of fatigue, but I hope they will help at least a little.

"Not a servant." I recently saw this picture: a toddler has been sitting in the sandbox for a year and a half, digging for something. Then he extends his hand to the side and says an inarticulate “Vyak!” - and as if by magic, a handkerchief, or a scoop, or a bottle of water appears in your hand. Mom runs around the sandbox with a huge bag, because the child doesn’t even try to stretch out his hand in her direction, and in order to respond to the next request, she has to run around the sandbox from one side to the other.

It is clear that such a mother gets very tired during a walk. It is also obvious that the child will have poor speech development. Physical development will also slow down. Of course, why learn to speak clearly if your mother already understands the intonations of your every “yak” down to the smallest detail! At the same time, both mother and child are absolutely happy at this moment: he – because all his whims are immediately satisfied, she – with her selfless “service”.

However, it is important to remember: you are not your child’s servant! You are his parent and mentor. You can help in some situation that the baby cannot cope with due to his age. But where he is able to act independently, let him act.

"My own game". Play with your child not only those games that interest him, but also those that interest you. If two people participate in the game, then it should be interesting for both. This rule helps children not only learn to negotiate and cooperate, but also perceive others as people with their own desires and preferences. And it is your example of truly passionate play that will allow your child to learn to play on his own.

“Seven nannies...” Unfortunately, living standards in society are now such that women can often take care of a child only at the same time as cooking, washing, ironing and mopping the floors. Of course, in this cycle of “wiping, squeezing, salting,” the child is especially irritated, and the feeling of fatigue sets in precisely because he cannot concentrate on one thing.

When starting to cook or clean up again, think about how your child can help you in this process. What part of the work can you entrust to him so that it is feasible and safe? For example, as a child I had a task - to make sure that the washing machine drained the water correctly. And I watched with pleasure every time.

However, remember: a child cannot do the same thing for a long time. Children are much more willing to complete several small tasks than one large one.

"Education Standards". Psychologists say that fatigue often masks dissatisfaction with the results of work. The same can be said about raising children. Sometimes we set ourselves “education standards” and drive ourselves into a trap, trying to ensure that the child corresponds to the ideals we have invented.

It is dissatisfaction with the child that makes us “invent” our fatigue. Convincing herself and those around her that she is very tired, the mother seems to be saying: “I’m doing everything I can, and I’m just exhausted. It’s not my fault that something doesn’t work out. I am a good mother!

If you understand yourself properly, if you understand what it is about your child that causes your irritation, and allow yourself not to worry so much about it, your chronic fatigue will most likely recede.

“Mom is sleeping, she’s tired...” At times, mom really gets so tired that she doesn’t want to see anyone. In this case, you should not overcome yourself (nothing good will come of this anyway), but relax.

First, announce to your spouse and children: “I’m tired! I need some rest. Now I’ll lie down for a bit, and then we’ll continue.” It is extremely unreasonable to complain about life and not change anything. If you say you are tired, go rest. And no half measures! Everyone must clearly understand what is happening.

Determine the time that you can allocate for rest (half an hour, an hour) and rest just that much. And during this time, veto communication. If the child is small and it is not yet possible to come to an agreement with him, give him a new interesting toy, play songs, ask relatives to keep an eye on the baby. During your vacation, do what you like: someone sleeps, someone reads. When you are tired not physically, but emotionally, monotonous work, such as washing dishes, helps a lot.

There is only one prohibition: you cannot utter a word at this time! Only this will allow you to truly relax. A telephone conversation with a friend may distract you, but you will also get tired of it. Silence will be a clear sign for the child of what exactly your rest is about. At first, he may pester you with questions. If the situation scares him, explain once again in few words what the matter is. Over time, the child will get used to the fact that it is pointless to contact you during rest. But after the rest is over, be sure to listen to him and answer all his questions.

Often conflicts arise due to misunderstanding: the mother is tired and wants to sit quietly, but the child decides that she is sad and begins to cheer her up. Mom, instead of having fun, attacks him: “Can’t you see that I’m tired?!” Does not see…

In addition, during the time when you are not resting, the child should “get enough” of communicating with you. The baby should not experience a lack of communication, otherwise he will compensate for this deficiency, despite any prohibitions. This is how a very hungry person eats, regardless of the rules of decency.

And if you learn to interact with each other harmoniously, calmly and respectfully, everything will be fine in your family.

“The Soul of Your Child” (Nikea Publishing House, 2014)

This book contains 40 questions from parents and answers from 28 experts, among whom are professional psychologists, teachers, priests, and parents of large families. Of course, parent-child relationships are not limited to these 40 questions, but personal advice and little secrets shared by experts will help parents better understand and feel their children, and perhaps even prevent difficulties and conflicts in their relationships with their children.

Tired of the baby. How to avoid irritation and relax

Contrary to popular belief, the most difficult time for young mothers is not the first year of a child’s life, but the period from one to three years. The baby no longer sits still, learns to speak, express his desires, and all this, together with the responsibility for his safety and household chores, greatly tires and sometimes irritates the mother. Is there anything we can do about this inevitable fatigue?

“I love my little daughter, but I get very tired of her, I often get irritated, swear at her, tell her to stop pestering me. Then I feel very ashamed and guilty. I understand that the problem is with me. What to do?"

First of all, it is important to understand that your problem is not unique. All parents get tired of their children. Caring for children is a serious and energy-intensive job that requires all your strength, both mental and physical. Only many parents are embarrassed to admit it. But a surgeon who has completed an operation, or an artist who has finished working on a painting, is not ashamed of his fatigue. In this sense, it is very good that you found the strength and courage to admit: I am tired of my work as a mother.

Here are a few “pro” parenting secrets. They, of course, will not completely relieve you of the feeling of fatigue, but I hope they will help at least a little.

Not a servant

I recently saw this picture: a toddler has been sitting in the sandbox for a year and a half, digging for something. Then he extends his hand to the side and says an inarticulate “Vyak!” - and as if by magic, a handkerchief, or a scoop, or a bottle of water appears in your hand. Mom runs around the sandbox with a huge bag, because the child doesn’t even try to stretch out his hand in her direction, and in order to respond to the next request, she has to run around the sandbox from one side to the other.

It is clear that such a mother gets very tired during a walk. It is also obvious that the child will have poor speech development. Physical development will also slow down. Of course, why learn to speak clearly if your mother already understands the intonations of your every “yak” down to the smallest detail! At the same time, both mother and child are absolutely happy at this moment: he - because all his whims are immediately satisfied, she - with her selfless “service”.

My own game

Play with your child not only those games that interest him, but also those that interest you. If two people participate in the game, then it should be interesting for both. This rule helps children not only learn to negotiate and cooperate, but also perceive others as people with their own desires and preferences. And it is your example of truly passionate play that will allow your child to learn to play on his own.

Seven nannies...

Unfortunately, living standards in society are now such that women can often take care of their children only at the same time as cooking, washing, ironing and mopping the floors. Of course, in this cycle of “wiping, squeezing, salting,” the child is especially irritated, and the feeling of fatigue sets in precisely because he cannot concentrate on one thing.

However, remember: a child cannot do the same thing for a long time. Children are much more willing to complete several small tasks than one large one.

Education standards

Psychologists say that fatigue often masks dissatisfaction with the results of work. The same can be said about raising children. Sometimes we set ourselves “education standards” and drive ourselves into a trap, trying to ensure that the child corresponds to the ideals we have invented.

It is dissatisfaction with the child that makes us “invent” our fatigue. Convincing herself and those around her that she is very tired, the mother seems to be saying: “I’m doing everything I can, and I’m just exhausted. It's not my fault that something doesn't work out. I am a good mother!

Mom is sleeping, she is tired...

At times, mom really gets so tired that she doesn’t want to see anyone. In this case, you should not overcome yourself (nothing good will come of this anyway), but relax.

Determine the time that you can allocate for rest (half an hour, an hour), and rest just that much. And during this time, veto communication. If the child is small and it is not yet possible to come to an agreement with him, give him a new interesting toy, play songs, ask relatives to keep an eye on the baby. During your vacation, do what you like: someone sleeps, someone reads. When you are tired not physically, but emotionally, monotonous work, such as washing dishes, helps a lot.

And if you learn to interact with each other harmoniously, calmly and respectfully, everything will be fine in your family.

From the book “The Soul of Your Child”

Dmitry Tutterin,

Hello, dear readers! The Internet has appeared and phrases that previously horrified and shocked society are now becoming more and more “normal” and I think this is good. If 10 years ago a young mother had said that she was tired of her child, she would have at least been burned at the stake: “Oh God, why can you say that?”

Nowadays, young parents calmly admit the feelings they experience, and therefore cope with difficulties more successfully. Friends and acquaintances will understand them and will even be able to help with good advice or deeds. The boundaries of what is permitted have blurred and what was customary to say only in confession has become quite acceptable in society.

Children can really get it and that's absolutely normal. Today we will talk on the topic “I’m tired of the child, what to do.” I will give you some tips that, I hope, will help you rest at least a little and after some time return to the role of a mother full of strength and joy. Well, let's get started.

Give up the Internet and mobile phone

Sometimes, even for a day, it is enough not to use these achievements of civilization to come to your senses and forget that everything is boring. How to bring yourself back to life? Psychologists give a basic recommendation: turn off your phone and do not go on the Internet (various social networks, do not read email, and so on). This is especially useful if friends and relatives constantly pester you with their negativity or start communicating if they want to boast about some kind of joy and demonstrate how well their life is going. In order not to upset yourself again, it is enough to avoid such unpleasant dialogues.

This is especially true for social networks, where you start looking at photos of happy and successful people and compare them with your seemingly worthless life. If such a pastime upsets you, then it is better to abandon it altogether.

7:30. THE ALARM CLOCK IS RINGING

Many people have difficulty waking up in the morning and hate getting up early. Try to take an example from your cat.

A cat doesn't fly off the bat - this is bad for both the body and the mood. He stretches, slowly opens his eyes and luxuriates for a while until he is fully awake.

Photo source: pixabay.com

Stretch and yawn. Don't make any sudden movements. Again, look at your cat: he stretches while still lying “in bed,” then gets up, arches his back, stretches again, yawns with all his might, sits up and blinks.

I know from myself, I started imitating Ziggy. And it’s much nicer than jumping out of bed like a pancake from a frying pan and dragging yourself to the kitchen to make yourself a cup of tea.

This phenomenon, practiced by many animals, is called "pandiculation" - a reflexive action that helps us "get off on the right foot" and which we humans often ignore.

Find hobbies and passions

You urgently need to introduce variety if you are tired of life. What to do to avoid negative thoughts? To do this, you need to do something so that you don’t have time for stupid things. It can be any hobby. If you don’t have a favorite hobby yet, then this is a great opportunity to try yourself in various industries. Drawing, embroidery, clay modeling, wood carving, hunting, fishing - anything, as long as it is interesting and enjoyable. Statistics show that people who have hobbies suffer least from depression.

Get a pet

Who, if not the smaller brothers, are able to lift a person’s spirits and constantly make him happy? Pets really prolong life and fill it with meaning, so you will never get tired of it. It’s more pleasant to return home when you know that they are waiting for you there. But it is worth taking a responsible approach to such an important decision and choice of animal. Some pets will definitely bring joy, while others will only cause trouble. Therefore, it is important to study in detail all the information about the breed before getting one.

Birds, fish, turtles and other animals that can calm the nervous system can become pets. But practice shows that the happiest people are those who take a dog or cat into their home. And some people have both for complete harmony. These furry animals charge a person with energy, health, make him more active, confident, sociable, responsible, independent and optimistic.

It is important to think a hundred times before getting a pet. This is a very important decision! Buying an animal can bring not only positive emotions, but also a lot of hassle.

Results

If you are tired of life, then this is not a reason to despair. There are many ways to cheer up and get your nerves in order. The main thing is to be active and start changing your life today!

Question to a psychologist

Hello, my name is Elena and I am 18 years old. I live with my boyfriend in a rented apartment, which is rented to us by relatives, we have a little daughter and she is 1 year and 9 months old. We didn’t sign with the boyfriend because... He most likely doesn’t want (and not as he says that he can’t due to certain circumstances...) I naturally want to live in marriage, like every girl, woman... My “common-law husband” is very hot-tempered, often our quarrels end in a fight, Naturally, I “lose” in them, because he is bigger than me (he is 24 years old). my husband is one of those people who don’t want to work and want to earn a lot... so he got a job as a loader and already he doesn’t like a lot of things, it’s hard, there are few days off... I already know that he’s unlikely to work for a whole month and I’m already worried that there will be conflicts about this, because... Before that, he didn’t work for a long time... and for me this is a lot of stress... we live poorly, we eat also poorly (pension 5000 rubles and children 2700), my parents and relatives live on the other side of the city, and his is very close and he is everyone day, sometimes every other day he goes there, sometimes for an hour, and sometimes for 4-5 hours, I don’t have any friends nearby, I’m completely alone (with my daughter)... when he’s at home he doesn’t want to go with us (with my daughter) for at least an hour to walk or sit with us on a bench, but on the same days when I suggest, in the evening he goes with a friend or an acquaintance for the same hour to talk... I would so like to go out with the whole family at least sometimes for a little bit... but no... we and We walk alone with our daughter and look at all the happy parents walking with the whole family... he is selfish, I will always give him more than myself.. I don’t even have to eat.. as long as he is not hungry.. it’s not that I’m always hungry, it’s just I’m saying that my love for him is greater than for myself...he often helps me with my daughter...at home. I don’t know why, but lately.. I want to go home, I don’t want anything... I’ve run out of joyful days, holidays (naturally I love my daughter and she makes me happy), but I don’t want anything anymore.., we count each a pretty penny, we don’t allow ourselves almost anything... it seems like he’s finally working... I should be happy... but... he goes to work, everything seems to be fine, he comes home from it, everything seems to be fine too... but in his absence, I’m thinking about when my daughter and I left him.. we often argued and often swear, in two years of relationship he kicked me out, both alone, and pregnant, and with a three-month-old daughter.. probably for 10... when we swear, he rushes at me, hit me once my nose started bleeding, and one day we had a fight, he kicked us out of our parents’ house (we used to live with his parents) and we made up after a very short time (evening 1), he told me when he took us back that he wanted to take us back me, take me into the forest, pour gasoline on me and burn me... and recently we were arguing... and he rushed at me when I was holding the child and wanted to break my neck, but came to his senses when my head was in his hands and the child was crying... I understand that I’m not Ideal either, I’m still learning everything, I’m learning to cook so that he devours both cheeks, I’m learning how to maintain a household, raise my daughter, I want everything to be fine and I’m ready to change, but I’m afraid that he’s not ready... I don’t know , what to do in my situation...except for my daughter and a trip to my loved ones, there is emptiness in my life...

How to revive cooled feelings?

In addition to falling in love and passionate relationships, marriage also has negative sides.

To overcome natural difficulties and at the same time gain a positive experience, you need to know some of the features of saving your personal life and restoring relationships in the key of mutual respect:

share your emotions . Memories have been serving humans for many millennia to receive and accumulate knowledge. Sometimes they can be used to gain peace of mind and inspire creative inspiration. Any feeling that is forever remembered as a positive emotion is considered an anchor for the family ship. It could be a first date, a bright kiss or a sudden meeting,
diversity in marriage is the key to family happiness. You should not focus too much attention on cleaning, cooking, washing, and various household details. Any attempt to make life more interesting will come in handy. These are well-known actions: an evening date, gifts, fresh flowers or coffee in bed, trips abroad,
thank each other for who you are, not who you want to be . Man is not an ideal being. Each has its own flaws and shortcomings. Many habits become very annoying already in the second year of life, but you can put up with them too. The main thing is to determine the most important aspects of the relationship so that minor behavioral factors do not affect life together,
figure out why you need each other . As a person grows up, he begins to understand why he changes every day, and what prompted him to do this. Perhaps the reason for the changes was the connection with the partner, but life will judge whether this is good or bad.

A marriage union is a unit of society in which, for the benefit of the cause, one should take care of each other with the help of well-established means of communication.