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financial independence: who controls your life?
There is one aspect of personal relationships that should not be underestimated. I'm talking about money. Many women dream of a knight in shining armor who will pay all their bills. They do not realize that Sir Perfection will simply cut the ground from under their feet. If he starts paying all the bills in the castle, he will also call the tune. And then the princess will no longer be a princess, but will feel like just a servant.
In this chapter, we will talk about what will happen if you forget about your beloved self and lose the ability to provide for yourself.
ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE No. 76
He will never respect you as a person if you are not able to stand on your own two feet financially.
By purchasing a car, you become its official owner and receive a document certifying this fact. Having this document in hand, you can always confirm ownership and payment. It shows that you have no obligations, no outstanding debts. You are the complete and sole owner of this vehicle and can do whatever you want with it. When a woman is as complete owner of her life, she enters personal relationships completely differently.
This is what many mothers instill in their daughters. By sacrificing independence and becoming financially dependent on a man, a woman loses her right to choose. It depends entirely on other people's desires and needs. That is why a woman needs to maintain her independence and remain a complete master of herself.
Work = Money = Independence = The ability to choose how you should be treated = Dignity Mothers understand how a man treats a woman who is financially dependent on him. She becomes for him not a joy, but a heavy obligation. And, realizing this, he stops viewing his relationship with her as a privilege worth fighting for. This does not apply to a woman raising children. When it comes to family, a woman must fulfill her responsibilities. A man does not perceive her as a dead weight, because he understands that her work is sometimes even harder than his. A man admits that he likes his job better than hers, so he treats the woman with respect.
As long as you have the ability to choose your terms, you remain your own master and retain power and strength. If you want to leave, you just pack up and leave. Your independence makes a man want you not to leave.
All the cuteness and sexiness in the world can't replace the knowledge that you won't tolerate being treated with disrespect.
By giving up control of your own life, you will immediately trap a man. He will feel responsible for you, and not the joy of being next to you. And this load may be too much for him. He will have to get food for two, find a roof over his head for two, pay all the bills for two. Very soon he will feel increased pressure and double responsibility not only for himself, but also for another person.
The bitch usually strives to maintain her own independence. She enters into relationships in such a way that no one perceives her as an additional burden. She will never find herself in a position where she is afraid to rock the boat. If she wants to do it, she will do it. It is very important that a man understands that you put your own dignity above all else, even if you are dating a very rich person. He must feel that if he treats you without due respect, you will immediately pack up and leave his mansion for your one-room apartment. He must feel that you would rather drive a Fiat Punto than a Mercedes-Benz if you have to endure disrespect for a luxury car. He should know that you were quite comfortable before he arrived, and you do not intend to tolerate what you do not like.
Usually you can make it clear through your actions, but sometimes you can say it through your words. Let's say you're watching a TV show where a poor woman gets bruise after bruise. You can use this moment to have an educational conversation with your partner who is blithely eating popcorn. Just turn around, look at him, look him straight in the eyes and say: “I would kill this man on the spot!”
ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE No. 77
You must show that you will not tolerate disrespect. And then the man will treat you with respect.
When faced with an independent woman, a man is too busy trying to impress her with anything. He has no time to be bored. If a woman depends on a man financially, he believes that he can afford anything, and she will endure it. Even if a man is disrespectful unintentionally, he will very quickly become bored if he feels that a woman will swallow any insult.
You don't have to be rich, you just have to be able to take care of yourself. Only then can you gain respect from a man. He won't invite you to dinner because you're hungry or don't have money. He will want to give you a gift, and you will have a choice whether to accept it. Only such gifts give people pleasure.
Jeanette told me about her ex-husband. When he was the only one working in the family, Jeanette felt out of place. She recalls: “My husband worked as a surgeon and made good money. But for four years I couldn’t buy myself a coat. I felt like I couldn't spend two hundred dollars on a nice coat because I didn't earn anything myself. I wore the jackets I wore in college or my husband's coat. As soon as I found a temporary job, I immediately felt better. Not only could I buy things for myself, but I no longer had to ask my husband for anything.”
If you can take care of yourself, everything a man gives you will feel like a gift. Your piece of bread will not depend on it. You will be able to live alone, and this will make him value your company more.
ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE No. 78
You must remain the master of your own life - with or without a man. He should never feel like you are completely at his mercy.
Susan B. Anthony said, “I would never sacrifice my freedom to become a housekeeper in a man’s house.” This is not about whether a woman will run a household. And not about whether she stays at home to raise children, because that is also difficult work. The main thing is whether the woman has the opportunity and strength to leave if she wants to.
When a man fully provides for a woman financially, the following happens: 1. He begins to feel trapped in which there is no way out. 2. He begins to treat her like an unintelligent child.
ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE No. 79
When a man treats a woman like a little girl or sister whom he is obliged to take care of, his passion weakens. He doesn't want to make love to his sister. A man needs a strong woman, not a helpless little child. Only a strong woman attracts him sexually.
I know one couple in which the husband, Michael, earns their daily bread. There are no children in the family, and only the man bears all the financial burdens. Every time his wife Nancy goes to buy a pair of shoes, she has to listen to a long and boring lecture from her husband. “You only have two legs. Why do you need so many shoes? There are 365 days in a year. You have a hundred pairs of shoes. You can change your shoes every 3.65 days. Here I have flip-flops, moccasins and work boots. Why do you need so many shoes? Do you see what shoes I'm wearing? I've been wearing them every day for two years now. I don’t understand why you need so many shoes?”
If Nancy worked, she wouldn't have to listen to any of this. But if a man pays all the bills, he feels entitled to control her expenses. It’s better for her to work as a waitress in a nearby cafe once a week, so as not to ask her husband for money every time. She could buy her own shoes and not have to explain anything to anyone.
ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE No. 80
The ability to choose your lifestyle and how others treat you is what gives you strength and power. When a man treats you like a little girl, he may act disrespectfully. He will decide that he can allow or prohibit you something or control your expenses. He may begin to dictate to you what you can buy and what you can’t. All these restrictions will deprive you of freedom and will not allow you to choose for yourself. You should not find yourself in this situation because:
- the ability to remain an independent-minded person will reinforce a man’s interest in you; - the ability to act according to your own choice is the most valuable thing you have, it is your strength and power. The man who pays your bills will very soon begin to not only dictate to you what you should buy and what you should not buy. He will determine what you can love and what you shouldn't. He will not ask for your opinion, he will tell you what your opinion should be. He will begin to consider you a Barbie doll at his complete disposal. And then the following will happen: - he will begin to think that he is always right and leave the last word for himself; - he will behave as he wants; - he will begin to control your feelings and needs; - you will feel that he is the boss and you are the subordinate; - he can offer you help on his own terms, and you will have to obediently wait at the door.
Financial independence of a woman
An article on the site will tell you today about a woman’s financial independence. Isn't it harmful to earn more than a man? A confident and loving woman will not compare her income with the earnings of her loved one. First of all, having a decent income, you will know for sure that you and a man are connected by deep feelings, and not financial obligations. Don't forget to tell your loved one about this.
After all, men, especially wealthy ones, often doubt that a woman continues to stay close only out of love.
Your financial independence certainly gives you self-confidence and comforts your soul. You have the opportunity to remain a woman, take care of yourself without boringly begging your loved one for money to visit beauty salons or buy another outfit. You will do this for your own money and once again please the eyes of your loved one, without annoying them with pleas to give you money.
See also the article - how to earn extra money for a hotel administrator. And another article - Women's business knitting to order.
English scientists once proved that financially independent women are much more likely to strive to diversify and realize their sexual relationships, in contrast to women who are financially dependent on their husbands. Your independence will allow you to keep a man in constant good shape: you are self-sufficient, beautiful, which means that indifference on his part can lead to a more attentive suitor paying attention to you.
You don’t have to account for the money you spend: I earn it myself and decide where to spend it! If you don’t have children yet, you can try to practice on your husband and fulfill his whims, of course, after you’ve pampered yourself.
There are also reasons why it is better to earn less than your significant other. A man is designed in such a way that he must remain a leader in any situation, even at home. Understanding himself as a breadwinner will give him self-confidence and make him move forward to new victories.
Not every husband will tolerate an independent and arrogant woman next to him (financially successful women often become just that).
Don't forget that you are a woman. If there is no particular need to work three jobs at the same time, you shouldn’t do it. Better find time to realize yourself in the field of your favorite hobby - cooking, interior design - devote time to an activity that will bring you true pleasure.
Of course, happiness in the home does not depend on who earns how much. The main thing is common aspirations and goals, the achievement of which together is an indicator of your unity and strong union. Be financially independent and free!