No money - 10 tips from psychologists on how to overcome financial difficulties


Pay for what you don't use

Situations when you give money for nothing happen more often than you might imagine.
Let's say you decide to take up sports and pay for a year of training. But then they stopped going to the gym: they got injured or the impulse didn’t last long. Often in this case, people simply wave their hand and do nothing, losing an impressive amount of money. Although you can resell the subscription if the terms of the contract allow it, or terminate the contract with the institution and return part of the funds. The gym you don't go to isn't the only black hole where money flows. Perhaps your payment for housing and communal services still includes a television antenna and a radio point, although these wires are not even connected to your apartment. Money is automatically debited from your account for subscriptions that you no longer use, but are too lazy to cancel. And even auto payments can be a bad help here if you don’t constantly monitor them.

Another weak point from a financial point of view is cellular communications. Let the operator offer you an “extremely favorable” tariff with a huge package of SMS and minutes within the network. If you only use mobile internet, why should you pay for it? It often turns out that wholesale is not cheaper at all. Look for exactly the set of services that you need.

“I cried and was hysterical”

A. is a young mother of many children. When it became clear that it was difficult for her, her husband and teenage twins to live in a rented apartment, the family took out a mortgage. They applied for a ruble loan several times, but were refused everywhere. Therefore, we agreed to the dollar option.

It was 2008, a few months before the crisis. During the process of payments, another baby was born into the family. The risky decision resulted in the family losing their home and a large sum of money.

– We wanted to buy a small-sized three-ruble note. Nothing fancy: tiny kitchen, area far from the center. It cost about six million at that time, we saved about 10% of this amount, and the rest went into a mortgage. At first the payment was quite comfortable, about 40 thousand per month.

When the first crisis hit, we asked the bank to convert the loan into rubles, but they refused. We made a second attempt in 2010, but again it was rejected. We were also refused in 2014, when the course took a sharp turn.

We decided that we would continue to strain ourselves. The monthly payment increased to 90-100 thousand, there were pennies left for living, no more than 20-30 thousand for the whole family. With this money we had to pay rent, buy food, and that’s it. There was no money left for anything else.

We calculated: during the period from 2008 to 2014, we made payments in rubles approximately in the amount that was the cost of the apartment. But thanks to the increase in the exchange rate, interest and annual insurance payments, the bank still owed about 11 million rubles. Meanwhile, the cost of an apartment on the market has fallen by about 30%. That is, it was no longer possible to even sell it profitably.

We paid almost until the end of 2020. But when all our savings were over, we sat down and calculated how much we had already contributed and how much we still had to pay. In the end, the apartment turned out to be simply “golden”. We decided to stop paying and go to court.

Before this, we contacted the bank several times with different proposals: convert the mortgage into rubles, reduce the monthly payment, extend the payment terms. But all these requests were refused.

The court sided with the bank. The case was transferred to enforcement proceedings to the bailiffs. They were looking for what else they could collect from us. By that time, we had sold the car, I filed for alimony for my husband, and since 50% of his salary was spent on this, it was also impossible to take anything additional from him.

The apartment was put up for auction and we were forced to move out. It was not sold immediately, and for an amount of less than 4 million. It turned out that we owed the bank about another 7 million rubles, which we, of course, did not have.

The bailiffs admitted that there was nothing more to take from us.

The bank tried to put gentle pressure on us all this time. They called and said: “Tell me, aren’t you ashamed?” How can I be ashamed if we approached them so many times with different proposals, but each time we were refused? All our relations with the bank took place in the legal field, and “ashamed” is not a legal concept at all.

Now we live in my parents' apartment. We don’t buy anything, not a car, not a dacha, because the bailiffs can still collect something to pay off the loan. I don’t go to work: in this case, the bank will be able to collect debts from us, since the family’s income has increased.

We haven't been on vacation since 2008. We are used to saving on everything: we make lists for purchases at Auchan, we willingly take second-hand things for our youngest child, and the older ones only go to free clubs. It helps a lot that we have many children: the twins eat at school, this is a huge help.

I remember with horror that year, from 2014 to 2020, when we paid 90-100 thousand monthly. Friends helped, shared children's things, and sometimes simply brought us food.

I remember on New Year’s Eve there was no money at all. I was in a trance... My husband was also very worried: for him, his main fear was that he would not be able to feed his family.

All this is very offensive, of course. Now I’ve let go a little, I can talk about it calmly, but if I were asked to talk about it at the very peak moment, I would just sob and be hysterical. Yes, we lost almost six million rubles and an apartment. But they are alive and well, and thank God, as they say.

Not reading documents carefully

From the point of view of the law, if you signed the papers, it means you agree with everything that is written in them. Not reading documents is a bad habit that can lead to dire consequences.

For example, you buy insurance for traveling abroad. But it says that you will receive compensation only if you poison yourself with mandrake root during the full moon. And the rest of the cases are uninsurable. As a result, you will have to treat a cold while traveling at your own expense, and you will also be wasting the money for the policy. To prevent this from happening, always read contracts very carefully.

“I was ashamed that I couldn’t pay the next installment, so I took out a loan”

I. is a working pensioner. When her family decided to take out a car loan, she and her husband received the salary. They planned to repay the contributions using the husband’s additional earnings: in his free time, he wanted to be a driver for distant relatives.

Everything collapsed overnight: I. stopped getting paid at the factory, and her husband’s services as a driver were also no longer needed. I had to re-borrow money from another bank multiple times to cover car payments.

– To be honest, we didn’t need this car; we could have lived without it. But a relative of my husband convinced me to buy it. She said this is an excellent option: on weekends we will go to the dacha, and on weekdays my husband will pick up this same relative’s daughter from school. They promised to pay for this, and the “salary” would cover the costs of the loan. Total benefit!

We agreed. We took out a car loan from the bank. This was in the early 2000s, when payments in dollars were still in use. The amount was 4000 in American currency. It was supposed to pay about 3,000 rubles per month, at the exchange rate (at that time - about 30 rubles per dollar). And at first everything went great. But then everything changed.

My husband was fired from his job, and his part-time job as a driver became completely different from what it was at first: a relative demanded trips out of town and the services of a personal driver throughout the working day. It was difficult for my husband; by that time he had suffered a heart attack and was in poor health. I had to refuse.

Well, then they began to regularly delay my salary at the factory where I worked. I did not have time to repay the car loan on the days on which monthly payments were scheduled.

I am a responsible person, raised under the Soviet Union. All these concepts about loyalty to one’s word and obligations put a lot of pressure on me. And when it was clear that I would not be able to deposit the next tranche, and there was no one else to borrow from, I decided to take out a loan from another bank.

Thus began a story that lasted for several years and turned into a vicious circle.

Almost every month I came to the second bank and asked to give me a loan in the amount of 3000-4000 thousand to pay off the car loan payment. Then, having received a salary at work, she returned this amount. But soon she was forced to apply for money again, because there was not enough money for food and household needs.

By that time, my husband was already very ill, my son got married and had a child - this whole large family was actually under my full care.

She gave, borrowed, paid and borrowed again. I don’t remember how many times I went through these operations, but by the end of the car loan payments, the debt to the second bank was 23,000 rubles: at that time (around 2006) this was a lot of money, almost the salary of an average manager, and at my plant I received less than 10 thousand. Only my son helped me pay; by that time he had gone to work and covered the debt.

But my husband was thoroughly crippled by this whole “car story”. His health began to deteriorate rapidly and he died. We eventually sold the car; it was no longer needed.

Keep long-term savings at home

If you are saving for old age, children's education, or some other deferred goal, there is no point in keeping bills at home. Over the years, some of the money will be consumed by inflation. The amount seems to remain the same, but the purchasing power of savings will decrease.

It’s worth at least considering banking products like savings accounts and deposits. But at the same time, keep your finger on the pulse in order to navigate in time if the situation in the country once again begins to change.

Better yet, start investing. Make money work, and it will not only fight off inflation, but also bring profit.

Fight (go to the end)

In some situation, you can’t give up - it’s premature.

Personally, I am the kind of person who can try 3, 4, or 10 times to be 100% convinced.

This applies not only to money, but also to many other industries...

Don’t give up at the first difficulties/problems that arise.

Always try to resolve all difficulties/problems and find a way out of a particular situation.

If you have already tried everything, everything, everything and you definitely can’t change/return/correct anything, you have no choice but to draw conclusions/learn a lesson/experience and move on. Well, what else is left to do?

Whining? Kill yourself? Thump and pour? Stay screwed? For what? What will this give you? Think about it...

Maybe at first, when the most acute and emotional phase of loss occurs, this is also the place to be, to throw out all your emotions, anger, rage, rage, to let your animal out, in the end to rest (so to speak, take a break - gain strength, put yourself in order ) - but this is not for everyone and should not last long...

Understand the point: in global terms, you can’t give up, because if you give up, you definitely won’t get any better!!!

Don't waste bonuses and miss promotions

It seems that now even tiny convenience stores have their own loyalty programs. Usually the buyer is offered either discounts or the opportunity to pay with bonuses that have accumulated on the card.

There are so many offers that the brain itself sometimes marks all such information as spam and deprives you of the opportunity to save. The points on the card may have an expiration date and simply expire, and the discounts may end. Therefore, if possible, track this information at least for the stores where you buy most often.

What the law says

If money was found on the street, in a public place, etc., then by law this is considered a find and one should be guided by Art. 227 Civil Code of the Russian Federation. As a rule, it is extremely difficult to establish the owner of this money. It’s one thing if you saw someone who lost this money, then by law it is necessary to immediately inform the owner about the loss and return the money, otherwise the actions of the finder may constitute a criminal offense under Art. 158 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation “Theft”.

If it is not possible to identify the owner, then you should inform the police or local administration. Thus, the finder has the obligation to take all measures to return the lost money to the owner.

Some believe that the money found belongs to the treasure. But this opinion is not entirely correct, because the main difference between a treasure and a find is that the treasure does not have an owner, or it is impossible to establish it. But money won’t just lie around, so someone lost it.

Ignore sales

You won't be able to buy everything at a discount. If your fall boots are torn in mid-October, it is obvious that you will buy them at full price. But missing out on sales is at least strange, because this is a great opportunity to save money.

For shopping to be profitable, you need to prepare for it. For example, you can go shopping in December and make a list of the clothes and shoes you like. There is a good chance that all this will be available at a discount during the Christmas sale.

These tips from psychologists will help you cope with worries if you have no money

1. Take a deep breath and exhale. Worrying about finances is fashionable today, but not productive. Adequate adults who value their health do not burn their nerves in vain. Think: the situation will either have to be corrected or accepted.

advice from psychologists will help you cope with worries if you have no money

If the problem can be solved, there is nothing to worry about. This is just your perception and it will soon cease to exist. Save your nerves for more important and pleasant experiences. If you can’t solve the problem, accept it. Think about how you will live in the coming days or months. Take it for granted.

2. Wise Jews used one good saying. When a Jew lost money, he raised his head up, turning to God, and said: “Thank you for taking it with money.” Think about it: you could have been hit by a car, you could have caused the accident, and your loved ones could have been hurt. Anything could happen in life. But there were only material difficulties. Maybe this is not a punishment, but a gift? Thank the Almighty.

3. Remember that a couple of centuries ago people lived differently. They rode horses, ate what they caught, collected and mowed. And they lived, and not bad. You can live completely without money. The question is that you have to leave your usual comfort zone. You worry about deprivation, this causes a feeling of discomfort. If you are not starving, you have nothing to worry about.

No money for fashionable clothes? — There are second-hand stores where you can grab quality items at a very low price. Can't go on vacation to the sea? — Russia is rich in river banks, where you can spend time even better, in peace and quiet. There are forests, parks, places with panoramic views. You can just walk around the city with a camera and take pictures. Sometimes it's better than a long trip to foreign places. You can simply take a regular bus and ride to another city.

No money for fashionable clothes

4. Nowadays, financial difficulties are unlikely to make you homeless. There are special solutions for this case: banks, deferments. If your business fails, you can declare yourself bankrupt. For every such case there is a way to solve the problem. Go online and briefly enter your sad story. You will find support, learn how other people coped. There is always a way out, nothing is new under the sun. Someone else found themselves in exactly the same situation.

5. Remember another saying: “There would be no happiness, but misfortune would help.” Tune in to the fact that you need this experience. If the stars align, then it’s necessary for you. Look for the benefits. You will increase your stress resistance and understand that money does not play such an important role. You may make an unexpected friend or meet your love. And in a decade, you will sit by the window, drink sweet coffee and remember this situation as something pleasant.

6. When nervous tension goes off scale, psychologists recommend switching. Any unnecessary worry is unjustified because it is unproductive. What does it do to you to be nervous? Nothing except gastritis and ulcers. You can relax right now, and nothing will change except your mood.

When nervous tension runs high

Think: you already have problems, is it worth stressing and worrying more? You deserve encouragement from yourself. Support yourself, cook a delicious dinner, take a walk, have a good time. Pat yourself on the head and say: “Everything will pass.”

7. Psychologists recommend watching movies as a way to relax. Cinema is called the most important of the arts for a reason. In the film you can find a hint for yourself and develop the right attitude towards problems. Using the example of the heroes, you will understand that you can cope with any situation. Yes, life is not a movie. But here there are exceptions to the rules.

If you like, watch horror. Immersed in the atmosphere of nightmares, you will soon want to be in your own world. There may be financial tasks here, but no one lives in mirrors, no one hunts you in a black robe with an axe. It's a thrill to just live! Reboot with a good movie. It is removed, for a second, precisely for this purpose.

8. There is a wonderful parable from a famous Russian psychologist. One day a representative of some company knocked on his house. He offered the man a choice of goods. Among others, he liked beautiful women's glasses. He wanted to buy them for his wife and kept the catalog for himself. The problem was the price: a high-quality item cost good money, and in order not to commit a rash, impulsive act, the psychologist waited for his spouse to come home from work. She said that she lost all her money along the way. There is very little left - the savings that were kept at home. The wife looked at the catalogue, upset. The husband sighed heavily. Instead of scolding, he hugged the upset woman and said: “If you lost money, the solution is obvious. We take these points." And with the remaining money they went to the cinema and bought wine.

Yes, it is difficult, but money is not important, people are important. And their comfort should be taken care of first. Give yourself a small gift. Support your loved ones who are also worried.

9. The ninth reason not to worry about financial problems: what will no longer bother you in 5 years should not be taken seriously at all. This is everyday garbage, and you need to take such turns calmly. Years will pass, the situation will no longer exist, but your nervous system will remain with you. Health is more important because money cannot buy it. Always use this principle. Forget it, erase it. And to quickly remove worries, play sports.

Sometimes all you need to do is make a few faces and you will feel relieved. Free your body from muscle tension, and the emotions that caused them will disappear. Start smiling persistently, and your inner state will change. And after an hour of exercise, you will feel like a new person. Sport heals better than medicine.

10. If all else fails, psychologists suggest playing with contrast. Visit a hospice, a clinic that treats people with cancer. There are children among them. There are different people there. They would give anything to be in your place. Wander around the cemetery. There lie those who would probably accept any setback to take your place. It's called: “I would like your problems.”

Incorrect use of banking products

Any banking product is a tool. Its effectiveness depends on how exactly it is used.

Let's say you have a credit card. You saw a last-minute tour with a great discount, but there’s still a week until payday. If you pay it with a credit card and pay off the debt seven days later, you will be able to save on travel and avoid interest. At the same time, you will be charged a commission for withdrawing cash from an ATM, and interest for late returns.

In order not to lose money, it is enough to understand how the product works.

Possible troubles leading to the situation - not enough money

First, remember: everyone finds themselves in similar situations from time to time. Look how many different troubles happen to different people. Perhaps someone is experiencing similar problems right now, at this very minute.

troubles leading to the situation - there is not enough money

  • Dismissal from work.
  • Inability to get a job.
  • Wages were not paid.
  • Unfairly fined. (And this always seems unfair to us).
  • Losing your wallet.
  • I was deceived in the store.
  • They put up someone else's credit. (And a completely offensive misunderstanding).
  • My loan turned out to be a heavy burden. (Very common problem).
  • Mortgage.
  • The need to make a large purchase, spend money.
  • Unsuccessful purchase without the possibility of a refund.
  • At a part-time job, they paid less than expected, or did not pay the money they earned at all.
  • Money was transferred to the wrong recipient. (It is not always possible to return).
  • A friend delays or refuses to repay the debt.
  • Robbed.
  • They seized part of the funds.

And there are many such situations. They are accompanied by other unpleasant moments: calls from creditors, collectors, regrets, shame. I want to buy something for myself or my loved ones, but I don’t have the opportunity. What to do in such cases?

Do not use bonuses from the state

The state has provided subsidies, benefits and other bonuses for us. For example, in some situations it helps with mortgage payments. Families with children receive especially generous offers.

Every citizen with a white income can receive a tax deduction. You will be refunded the money you paid towards personal income tax. You can use this right when buying an apartment, treatment, training and in some other situations.

And that's not all. Do not hesitate to find out what you are entitled to from the state.

How to rise when everything or a lot is lost?

Let's think about it: what are the options here (in these situations)? In my opinion, there are only two of them.

1) You either stay in the ass or you 2) get out of the ass and achieve new heights and successes.

I understand perfectly well what it’s like when a person is depressed / difficult / in pain = but what do you want to hear?

Any motivational speeches? Fuck them. You just have to get over it. Do you think you're the only one like this?

Each of your failures/losses = makes you internally stronger (spiritually, as a person). Because in such moments (and the more lost = the worse you feel) the person (you) suffers.

And as I have said many times, personality develops very strongly when it suffers, when it really hurts. What I mean is that mistakes, failures, negativity, pain, suffering = this is not always bad.

This is a natural part of the learning process and it’s up to you what happens next.

Success is the ability to move from failure to failure without losing enthusiasm.

Do you think that all successful people succeeded at once, they did not fail, they did not make mistakes?

Do not make me laugh. Money and success in general = doesn’t come easy (easy) to anyone. Nothing falls from the air.

You either want this yourself (to be a financially successful person, to live well, not to need anything, to take care of your family, your woman, children, etc. so that everything is fine for everyone) and as a result you will rise and achieve new peaks and heights, or you 2) don’t want to, so continue to sit in the ass. There is no third option here.

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