Family and career - in love and harmony
Waking up today, while still in bed, you clearly feel that all that makes you happy about the upcoming working day is new lingerie from Victoria's Secret, which will look great through a thin white blouse. Complete the look with classic pumps and a formal pencil skirt that really suits you. When remembering my immediate responsibilities, which the profession of politics proudly entails, nausea sadly crept into my throat.
I think the picture is painfully familiar to many.
And it’s not even a matter of the specialty that you were lucky or unlucky enough to get.
Everyone: economists and accountants, doctors and cosmetologists, educators and teachers, politicians and private entrepreneurs, if they belong to a special caste of “women,” are united by the same syndrome.
It is progressing and growing at a tremendous pace.
Fatigue syndrome from a weight that is too heavy for gentle shoulders, eternal attempts to harmoniously combine family and career.
I can already hear: “Some women’s shoulders can hardly be called tender. It’s worth watching my friend who, while successfully managing her profession as an investigator, manages to raise two young children, attend shaping classes, grow lemons in flowerpots, and write poetry in the evenings.” But it’s unlikely that a friend, after drinking a glass of cognac in a friendly company, will talk about how happy she is, about how she has completely accomplished both as a woman and as a specialist. Most likely, the sympathetic ears of listeners will be told the story of how a shoulder that was once drawn nearby, by definition strong, turned out to be weak, and how she, from a gender, by definition gentle, became a creature of an indeterminate gender: outwardly tender and sensual, but in functional purpose – universal.
The fact that women are the guardians of the hearth has not been indicated by us for a long time.
There is no point in inventing something that has already been known for a long time.
For attempts to reshape the purpose of the sexes, nature takes revenge.
It is not possible to maintain a peaceful situation for long in a family where the husband, having previously picked up the child from the garden and bathed him, prepares a roast for dinner, and the wife, having returned at ten in the evening from a nervous but highly paid job, suddenly suddenly transforms into a gentle cat by nightfall.
This alignment of events is possible only as a temporary one.
Yes, this option for getting out of current life circumstances sometimes even holds the family together.
But we must try with all our might to restore the hierarchy of family relationships laid down by the Almighty himself.
Otherwise, with moderate or rapid steps, we are approaching a dead end.
"Exit?" - you ask.
Firstly, be attentive to the choice of your craft and learn to restore balance in time if you suddenly swung strongly towards a career, taking you far from your family.
Remember: the profession should please and complement your spiritual harmony, just as the profession of journalist complements the harmony of the author of this article - your humble servant.
It is not permissible for a woman to live with the attitude that money is obtained at the cost of blood, sweat and personal happiness: this is how it will happen.
Secondly, take a responsible approach to choosing a man for the family.
And do not take away with your own hands the happiness of being a man: a father and protector, support and support, an example to follow.
Agree, we often sin with this, and then we whine, disentangling the mistakes of raising our men.
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Order in the home and harmony in the family
Greetings, dear friends! the “ Home Tips ” section with the following topic: “Order in the home and harmony in the family.” Housekeeping is not only about cleaning, washing, ironing and cooking. This is the art of creating coziness and comfort, a good mood for our loved ones. Don't know how to achieve order and harmony in your home? Can't plan everything correctly and protect your apartment and life from chaos? Practical advice in the article will tell you how to get rid of complete chaos and harmonize your life.
From my life experience
In my opinion, all women can be divided into two categories: those who are neat and...those who are philosophical about disorder. The most interesting thing is that in my youth I belonged to the first group. There was such a case. When my husband and I had just gotten married and lived in a one-room apartment, friends invited us to go to nature to relax on May 1, after the demonstration. So I refused because I didn’t have time to clean the windows for the holiday. I spent the whole day cleaning windows and putting things in order.
I thought that the floors must be washed twice a week and the dust wiped every day. On Saturday, of course, general cleaning of the entire apartment. Now I remember this with a smile and am happy to include myself in the second group of women who have a philosophical attitude towards everything, including cleaning. For example, over the years I have realized one thing: love for order should not be a burden for loved ones.
Its meaning is to bring joy and not be the cause of quarrels.
What is the secret of order?
Not every person knows how order in the house and interpersonal relationships in the family are connected. You may not tidy your house and create a “creative” mess around you, but soon you will not be able to correctly solve life’s problems.
Psychologists believe that you can achieve harmony in your own life if you learn to keep your home in perfect order. The apartment is an extension of the personality and reflects all the features of a person.
To learn how to keep your home in perfect order, you need to follow some simple rules:
- Do not put off until tomorrow those things that can be done now.
- Throw away unnecessary trash.
- Always distribute your energy and free time.
- You shouldn't plan everything on the weekend.
- During the week, spend 20-30 minutes every day to restore order in one of the places.
It is important to part with unnecessary things that do not provide any functional value without regret. You cannot store anything unnecessary in the house. Also, you shouldn’t be nostalgic for every little thing. There is no need to store children's drawings and baby vests in bags. Memorable drawings, for example, can be photographed and saved on your computer. Every thing in the house should be frequently used, loved and useful.
How to achieve order and harmony: important aspects
There are several important points that should not be forgotten. If the house is being renovated, pay special attention to interior planning. When planning, it is important to consider the presence of shelves in the house, additional cabinets for things, and maybe even a dressing room. This will help store household items - they will not lie on surfaces, thereby creating clutter. At the same time, cleaning at home will be much easier and faster.
It is important to choose a specific place for each item. This doesn't always work, so don't be afraid to experiment. You can use the help of an experienced designer. A successful interior will fill the whole house with special comfort, and you will feel as comfortable as possible.
Establishing family relationships
How to achieve order and harmony in your family? You can restore harmony in your soul and improve relationships with loved ones by doing a thorough cleaning of your apartment. All family members should be involved in the process; it is important to do the work together. Children of any age should certainly take part in putting the house in order. So try:
- direct children's energy in the right direction;
- tell juniors how to properly complete the assigned work;
- Set achievable goals for yourself and your children.
Of course, the example of elders plays an important role - children always copy the behavior of their parents, so when cleaning, pay attention to a good mood and compliance with certain rules. The first and most important rule is that all things should be grouped into zones. For example, shirts go with shirts, jeans go with jeans. When each item of clothing is clearly in its own zone, you spend much less time searching. After all, you already know where and what lies.
During the cleaning process, you will learn to understand your feelings. Think about what exactly each thing is needed for, and what emotions it evokes. Without regret, part with clothes that do not bring you a feeling of joy and positive emotions. Such things should not be kept in the house - give them to those in need. This way you will free up the necessary space for something new in your life and get rid of the bad habit of accumulating various junk.
After general cleaning, your home will shine with new colors, and everyone at home will be in a favorable mood. But, don’t forget to always keep your home tidy - don’t wait until dirty dishes accumulate in the sink or dust covers the furniture.
Finally, about order in the house
And also, treat cleaning creatively: not as a tired routine, but as creating beauty around you. And, of course, there will be one less reason for quarrels. Because, like order in the house, there is harmony in the family.
In conclusion, according to tradition, several songs on the topic of order and cleaning.
A song about cleaning. Unfortunately, the author is unknown.
The song “About Fun Cleaning” is performed by MakSim.
Music for cleaning rooms.
Thank you for your attention, dear readers! If you want to learn more interesting things from the “Housekeeping” section, then subscribe to updated articles in the “ Home Tips ” section. Better yet, send your tips and share with us. Don't forget to recommend articles to your friends on social networks!
May everything be fine with you, Vera.
Family functions
Why is the traditional family on the verge of extinction? Because it no satisfy all the needs of each of its members, as well as the general ones, as it was before.
The family has many functions:
- physical and spiritual-moral reproduction of a person,
- socialization of children,
- maintaining culture,
- transfer of experience, knowledge, skills, abilities,
- personality formation,
- personal growth of everyone in the family,
- maintaining physical health,
- financial support for children and the elderly,
- spiritual mutual enrichment,
- organization of recreation,
- mutual enrichment of interests,
- psychological protection,
- emotional support,
- natural psychotherapy,
- satisfying the need for communication,
- social control,
- restoration of strength,
- sexual satisfaction and so on.
Based on the functions, it is easy to understand that the family should be a heavenly place for a person, an environment that will satisfy all and any of his needs!
It is precisely because this does not happen that people do not want to live in a family.
How to make sure that all the needs of a person in a family are met and at the same time each member is happy and satisfied with life?
How to maintain harmony in yourself and in your family during forced isolation
Self-isolation in the company of loved ones, especially spouses with whom you have lived for many years, seriously tests people and their relationships with each other. Thus, in China, which is now recovering from the epidemic, a peak in divorces has been recorded in recent years. How not to hate each other, spending a long day together within four walls? We asked Revda psychoanalyst Marina Batalina to think about this.
Marina Batalina. Photo // personal archive
— The sudden forced isolation disrupted the long-established way of life of every citizen of our country. Even for those who are forced to attend the workplace despite the serious danger.
A tense environment and fear of infection worsen the overall psychological background. Self-isolation is beginning to be perceived by some as a kind of imprisonment. And like everything unusual, it can frighten or irritate. Man is a social being, communication with other people is important to him, and any reason for isolation, firstly, is regarded as a threat of loss of contact. Which raises the level of anxiety even more. There are different categories of people, their reactions and consequences of isolation will be different for each category.
Isolation has given some people an unusual amount of free time. This situation can frighten people who are used to working hard and intensively. Most of them, of course, were forced to switch to remote work and, in fact, only changed the place of action. For this category of people, the fear of stopping, of being unclaimed, is perceived extremely negatively and painfully.
If for some reason remote work is still impossible, then a change of activity can bring relief.
Try to shift your usual level of tension from work to home - regular workouts, for example. Or start learning a new material, foreign language or art form online. In this case, the brain will not have to do without the usual load for a long time and isolation will be tolerated much easier for the psyche.
Another category is parents. Spending an unusual amount of time with your child can be a serious challenge for some. A sharp increase in time spent together can be unconsciously perceived as violence or guilt, aggravating the overall situation, which is already complicated by anxiety and lack of confidence and stability.
If you experience such painful feelings, you should understand: this does not mean that you do not love your child. Building a daily routine will certainly help here - it will help structure the child’s psyche with the predictability of the space around. Well, ideally, there is a division of parenting responsibilities between father and mother.
Plan activities with your baby, prepare everything you need. For example, sensory boxes, age-appropriate art kits, audio books. Set aside a specific time for family gadgets. For most children, parental involvement is only necessary during the initial stages of learning a new skill or process. Being nearby for the first ten minutes, showing the child exactly how to do this or that activity, is quite enough. The rest of the time the child will be busy playing independently, and this time can be used for himself. Take a bath, or read a book, or do some household chores. The key to success is a fairly frequent change in the child’s activity, based on age. The older he is, the more diligent he is, the more time he will spend on playing independently or studying a manual.
The lives of married partners in isolation are also seriously tested. The modern pace of life generally does not imply or provide the opportunity for deep immersion into the personality of another. In other words, it turns out that we don’t know the person we chose very well.
When forced into close contact in a state of general anxiety, all the shadow sides of the personality come to the fore, and the first person to whom they are presented is the wife or husband, as the most accessible objects.
The outcomes of such stories are very individual. For some, this period will be a gift and will help them meet and get to know each other better, while for others it will be the last straw or an opportunity to put an end to the relationship. The last option also has many branches and nuances. It is difficult to give any specific effective recommendations, except perhaps the beginning of psychological work, personal or in a couple. The better a person knows and understands himself, the more understandable his partner’s responses are to him.
Simply put: if a partner oppresses, humiliates or physically hurts and you repeatedly allow this, then we can talk about a lack of inner self-worth and self-respect. If you want to change the world around you, start changing yourself.
He, the World, reacts to what we are filled with and what we nonverbally transmit to others.
More on the topic
- Psychologist Marina Batalina - on how to help yourself or loved ones who suffer bullying within the family
- The owner of the Vitamin chain, Alexander Sumarokov, talks about what the coronavirus pandemic teaches us
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