Anna basis Shyness is a trait inherent in a large number of people, but its excessive manifestation does not allow many of us to live a full life, to make new acquaintances, including with representatives of the opposite sex. , who are not experienced in romantic communication with guys, even if they want to take a step towards a young man, they do not do this and do not respond to advances. Shy representatives of the fair sex should remember that guys often think about how not to be shy with girls. Therefore, shyness should not be considered a vice, but it should not be elevated to the rank of virtue either. So you can spend a black and white life, watching from the side how brave girls enjoy the whole palette of colors. The problem of shyness can be solved, but it requires delicacy. First of all, you need to find out whether the girl is shy only with guys or is she timid with all people?
How not to be shy about people?
Among us there are many unsociable girls who are content with a long-established circle of friends: family members, their only friend, neighbors, an individual trainer from a sports club or a tutor... They are the ones who most often ask the question “how not to be shy with people?”
You can get rid of excessive embarrassment in front of people using the following methods:
stop delving into yourself; think more often about your merits and successes; remember that people are more worried about their own shortcomings, and they don’t care about strangers; take into account that other people are sometimes shy too; instill in yourself a feeling of confidence (at least 5-10 minutes a day) until it becomes habitual; When communicating with another person, do not focus on yourself, but delve into the conversation of your interlocutor.
After working on yourself and noticing that these methods work, you can begin the second stage of the fight against shyness. To do this, you need to constantly expand your social circle, making new acquaintances wherever possible: on public transport, while jogging or walking your pet, at a performance, in queues. Then even an overly reserved person will gradually begin to loosen up and acquire communication skills with unfamiliar people. This will help you stop worrying and start living normally.
Why should you stop being shy about your boyfriend and how to do it?
At any moment, the calm and measured life of a young representative of the fairer sex can be interrupted, and the reason for this will be meeting the guy of her dreams. At first, the girl is unlikely to trust him 100%, but excessive embarrassment will also not bring any benefit - in this case, the relationship between the young people will end before it even begins.
You shouldn't be shy about guys for the following reasons:
There is a chance that the guy is shy too, and this is another obstacle in the relationship. Most likely, the young man already has experience communicating with girls, against the background of which an overly timid chosen one will look at least stupid. So as not to feel awkward. If the same guy were the girl's cousin, would she be shy in front of him?
How to get rid of shyness in front of a guy: general tips
In order for the excitement to begin to go away little by little, you can imagine that the first acquaintance has already passed. But when you begin to eradicate shyness, you should not get too carried away, because this trait is an indicator that the girl has a subtle and sensitive nature that is capable of empathy and love.
You can overcome shyness in front of a young man in stages, in four steps:
First of all, the young lady needs to think: how would she like to see herself next to a guy; What traits would she give to the main character if she were writing a novel about herself? Having decided on the image, you need to find out what will be required to bring your plan to life? Perhaps these are neat low-heeled shoes, thanks to which their owner will not feel like a “giraffe”. Or maybe it’s about a stylish hairstyle that can give a girl self-confidence? The list of options for getting rid of shyness in front of a guy is endless, so you need to approach this issue depending on your circumstances. What about an act that previously seemed completely fantastic to our heroine? For example, you can, without waiting for a guy’s initiative, invite him for a walk, and during the walk also offer him a taste of a pie that the girl herself baked according to her grandmother’s recipe. A young man is unlikely to refuse such an offer, because guys are also lovers of sweets! By following the first three points, the girl will become much more confident in herself. And then, calling on his imagination to help, he will begin to experiment. If your thoughts are busy with new ideas, and your time is busy with their implementation, then there will be no time to be shy!
How to stop being ashamed of your body in front of a guy?
It also happens that everything goes as it should: the girl confidently communicates with the object of her adoration, the relationship between the young people develops. But here, as luck would have it, the problem begins to “gnaw” at her: how to stop being ashamed of your body in front of a guy? Before this, the young lady skillfully hid her figure flaws under her clothes: her protruding belly was covered with spacious tunics; small breasts were “complemented” by the foam rubber of the bra; Cellulite thighs were hidden in the folds of a long skirt.
No one has yet solved the figure problem by wearing a “burqa” and “timidly hiding a fat body in the cliffs.” This requires a comprehensive approach, including diet, exercise and self-esteem. The girl needs to take care of the last point first, because the young man will not wait for her to lose weight and get pumped up.
To get rid of complexes, a girl can remember the first days of meeting a guy. After all, he consciously chose her and did not make any comments about her figure, even seeing a number of shortcomings (unfortunately, you cannot completely hide them under clothes).
What if you watch your friends? For example, Irina is an immense chubby, but so charming, witty, smiling and with a sparkle in her eyes! That’s why there’s no end to the guys. And Valentina, having a chiseled figure and an antique face, is always “in the background” because she is arrogant, boring and “empty”. Thanks to such observations, you can develop a line of your own behavior and not worry about how to stop being embarrassed about your body in front of a guy.
Embarrassment is the main obstacle to success of any kind, and even more so when it comes to relationships between the sexes. Don't be afraid to say a word for fear of seeming awkward. Any embarrassment can be turned into a joke and we can laugh together. It is important not to deprive yourself of the pleasure of spending time with the guy you like. To achieve what you want, you need to suppress shyness and take at least a small step towards your dream. Many sayings say the same thing: “An attempt is not torture”; “If you're afraid of the wolf, don't go into the forest!”; “He who doesn’t take risks doesn’t drink champagne,” etc.
December 25, 2013
If you are always looking for ways to stop being shy when communicating with guys, then I can help you. Of course, sometimes you can be embarrassed, but guys love confident girls. If you are confident in yourself, you will get the guy you like faster than you think. So, 7 ways to stop being shy about guys.
Don't be afraid to be silly
One of the most effective ways to stop being shy with guys is to not be afraid to be silly sometimes. If you like this music, get up and dance. Who cares? The guy will see you dancing confidently and will join you. Trust me, he will appreciate it.
Don't be afraid to show yourself
I know it's very hard, but if you really want to learn how to stop being shy with guys, then you just need to learn how to open up. If you talk more about yourself, believe me, the guy will be more interested in spending time with you.
Be yourself
Another important point - always be yourself and show him who you really are. If you are yourself, it will be much easier for a guy to communicate with you and get to know you as a person.
Try to push the boundaries of what is possible
Do you constantly feel shy when talking to guys? Then you just need to try to push the boundaries of the possible. Do something unusual, like asking him out for a walk or a date first. Trust me, guys love girls who know how to push the limits.
Don't limit yourself
Never limit yourself when communicating with a guy! Don't want to open up completely on the first date? Okay, then focus your attention on the things you want to tell him that he needs to know in order for him to like you.
Be confident in yourself
As you have already noticed, I repeat the same thing all the time - be confident in yourself! If you really want to learn how to stop being shy with guys, then you just need to learn to be confident. Wear clothes that make you feel confident, stop being nervous and go on a date.
Don't worry if you are not appreciated
If the guy you went on a date with didn’t appreciate you and refuses to see you, remember, you will still meet that guy who will love you for who you are.
Now that you are no longer shy about guys, try starting a conversation with a guy you like -. Or push him. Now you know all 7 ways to stop being shy about guys. Perhaps you have your own tips on how to stop being shy when communicating with guys. Share with us.
Shyness is a real problem for many people, which prevents them from communicating with strangers, causing feelings of panic, nervousness and fear. Shy people find it more difficult to build a career and establish friendships and personal relationships. If you have this problem, you need to solve it urgently, and for this you need to listen to some advice.
Why are girls in love shy about a guy?
And how can you remove this embarrassment?
Because they don’t know each other very well, the girl is afraid to say or do something that the guy won’t like. She tries to show her best side if she hopes for a long-term relationship. She doesn’t know how the guy will react to one or another of her actions or words. The embarrassment goes away if both see that they are suitable for each other, live on the “same wavelength,” common interests appear and it turns out that their views coincide. Then she becomes bolder and behaves naturally, since she can know for sure that her action will be perceived adequately by the guy.
Girls in love are only shy at the beginning , they are simply afraid to do or say something wrong - after all, this can somehow influence the guy , he won’t like it, the opinion will not be very good, and in the end - it will be unpleasant to communicate with her, or simply he'll get bored!
And embarrassment can only be overcome if the guy shows the girl that with him she can be herself and trust him completely!
After this, the embarrassment will disappear as if it never existed!
I myself am shy in front of guys - so as not to seem too talkative and cheeky , and I just don’t want people to think badly of me - it’s not very pleasant, and then everything goes away, and I become the same as I am with my friends!
In my opinion, this is quite normal) I judge even from myself - even if a representative of the opposite sex, the innate feeling of shyness does not allow you to just jump on his neck like that. It is necessary for the couple to get to know each other a little, and then invisible boundaries will fall)
A girl with a pure soul and thoughts loves sincerely ashamed of her love
They are embarrassed because in our culture girls are forbidden to show sincere interest in their lover. And if she behaves like this, she will be rejected.
This means that the guy needs to win over the girl so that she feels comfortable.
And the easiest way is to talk and listen. If a girl opens up to a guy, and he can remember what she said and build a conversation further, then over time she will become much more comfortable.
It’s also worth remembering that rude words and criticism can ruin your mood and nullify your desire to open up to a guy. Who would be pleased to have their lover criticize you?
It’s just a common thing among us that women are talkative, but on dates men talk more. Giving the girl the opportunity to express her opinion will help her relax.
How to stop being shy about people?
To cope with embarrassment, you should understand that this is not an innate, but an acquired quality. If you make an effort, you can easily get rid of it. Typically, shyness is the result of certain events that happened to a person at a certain point (usually in childhood).
With age, it is necessary to get rid of this quality in order to gradually enter the world, establish normal relationships and adapt to new conditions. There are several tips that should help you cope with the problem.
First, you need to understand that every person has certain achievements that you can be proud of (you have them too). Think about your successes at work, at college, at school or in sections.
Most people are focused exclusively on their problems and shortcomings, so you shouldn’t think that every person looks at you with contempt and is waiting for you to stumble and make a mistake.
There are no people who are not shy, there are those who skillfully hide it. Even some celebrities are afraid of public speaking and their fame, what can we say about ordinary people!
Analyze what causes you the most embarrassment, what situations or people. You will have to try to avoid such conditions for some time. You should first try to deal with shyness where it is easiest.
If possible, try not to get into a situation where you feel awkward. Try to feel confident in yourself as often as possible - this state should become familiar to you, and you will stop being shy.
Most often, shyness occurs when a person finds himself in an unfamiliar situation or environment. As a result, he worries about how others will treat him. As soon as you feel discomfort in an unfamiliar company, find someone you know. With someone you know, you will feel more confident and stop being shy.
While communicating, study those around you. Take a closer look and listen to what they are saying, find out the rules of communication and follow them so as not to attract unnecessary attention to yourself.
Communicate without focusing on yourself. Pay attention to your interlocutor, ask questions and be sincere.
Never compare yourself to other people. Each person has their own “pros” and “cons”. If you start comparing, you will only pay attention to your shortcomings, forgetting about your advantages. In this case, you will never stop being shy.
What to do if the first attempt fails
- Understand that life is not over, the sun still rises and sets, and the Earth rotates in the same direction. However, it will be easier to endure unpleasant emotions in solitude or with a close friend/relative/dog.
- Don't hesitate to try again. Perhaps not right away and not even with the same person, but everything will work out. And in a year, if not much earlier, the memory of this incident will only bring a smile.
- Analyze what went wrong. Maybe it's a matter of inexperience or carelessness. And sometimes the reason for failure is the partner’s lack of the same experience.
- Remember the couple's reaction. If a person openly began to ridicule, then most likely he tried to cover up his own complexes with this laughter. If the partner encouraged, reassured, or continued to try to kiss, then everything is not so bad. Finding the courage to meet him again is the best solution.
This article describes how to learn to kiss and what to do in nervous situations. However, stories about the first kiss are numerous and different. Some people spend weeks on end learning this art and still end up in trouble. And some people don’t bother at all about this and simply enjoy the pleasant excitement that arises before one of the most romantic events of their life. The main thing is not the technique, but the live emotions between lovers.
Learning to communicate with the opposite sex:
- Many modern women are lonely, this is due to distrust of men and shyness. If you don't want to be alone, you will have to overcome your shyness and fear of guys. To do this, you need to understand a few rules:
- Remember that life doesn't just happen at home or at work. If you want to stop being shy about guys, get out of the house more often, go to clubs, cafes, restaurants, cinemas, concerts, sports clubs and attend various events.
- Try to spend more time in the company of men, choose topics of conversation in which you are best versed. Be confident in yourself and keep in mind that men are no less shy when communicating with women. So it’s not better to be the first to stop being shy and try to make the dialogue pleasant for both of you.
- If you like a man, but are afraid to talk to him, think that while you are shy, someone else might notice him. You have to fight for your happiness, so you simply don’t have time to be embarrassed.
- You can start a conversation with the man you like with a trivial question. For example, ask what time it is or what bus you can take to get to this or that place. If he shows interest during your questions, communication will improve on its own.
- If the guy you decide to talk to doesn't appreciate you, don't worry. You will definitely meet the man who will love you for who you are.
How to get rid of embarrassment?
You can overcome embarrassment by reading aloud. It doesn’t matter where you do it - at home, in front of friends or in public places. This habit will teach you to hear your voice and train your diction. The more often you read in public, the faster you will overcome shyness.
Enter into dialogues with strangers. This will not only solve the problem of how to stop being shy, but will also give you self-confidence.
If you are embarrassed about your appearance (this usually applies to girls), you can solve this problem with the help of a mirror. Sort out your reflection, and the “cons” of your appearance. Psychologists say that most women tend to exaggerate their shortcomings. This problem can be solved by loving yourself. If you have serious but solvable problems with your appearance (for example, excess weight), take care of yourself.
Practice affirmations and visualization. Yes, many do not believe in these psychological tricks, but practice shows the opposite. Saying phrases like “I am confident in myself”, “I am not shy”, “I am beautiful”, “I am loved”, etc. gives a positive result.
Write down your strengths on a separate piece of paper and hang it in the most visible place in your home. Every time you are unsure of yourself, read out loud about your advantages and admire yourself in the mirror.
Shyness is inherent in almost all people, but its frequent manifestation interferes with normal life and romantic relationships. Young girls, inexperienced in love, may be afraid to take a step towards a guy or even respond to his advances. It is possible to help such a problem, but it requires delicacy.
If a girl says: I’m shy about guys, then this is the first step towards getting rid of shyness, because it is known that recognizing the problem makes it easier to deal with it. As a rule, a girl’s shyness is typical for a certain age, and you shouldn’t worry too much about it. The extreme stage of embarrassment, when a girl is unable to speak in the presence of guys or even be near them, can cause concern.
You need to overcome embarrassment gradually, because if you try to solve the problem unceremoniously, you can aggravate the situation, making it even worse. The main thing is not to stop, moving towards your goal step by step, but there is no need to overdo it, confusing lack of embarrassment with impudence, which does not suit a girl.
Embarrassment arises due to a lack of self-confidence; often a girl considers a certain guy to be the ideal young man, being sure that she is not worthy of him. This is characteristic of extremely young girls, almost girls, who are captive of their romantic fantasies. Most often this is age-related and goes away on its own. If the problem requires intervention, you need to approach its resolution wisely. How to stop being shy about a guy? If a girl is afraid to speak in the presence of guys, it is best to visit companies with interests that are clear to her, because if she has something to say, embarrassment recedes on its own.
You can overcome embarrassment by increasing your own self-esteem; it is better to do this without using banal self-hypnosis, but by truly becoming a better person, which others will appreciate. After all, having succeeded in something, a person boldly looks into the faces of those around him, internally feeling that he has something to be proud of, and embarrassment prevents further improvement and communication with other people, which encourages him to fight against it. But you shouldn’t boast too much about your achievements to others, they won’t appreciate it.
Most often, a girl is shy about the guy she likes, behaving with other guys absolutely relaxed, without showing any timidity. It is important to understand that not only young girls, but also fully grown, experienced people are shy about the people they like. In this case, you can confess to your close friends, saying: I’m embarrassed by the guy I like, and try to solve the problem together, but you need to be careful, not everyone will be able to feel a similar situation.
If a friend agreed to help, perhaps he will suggest a solution to the problem or talk to the guy he likes, however, in this case, the friend must have the girl’s complete trust. Sooner or later, you need to talk to the guy you like, confessing your feelings to him. If a guy has a negative attitude towards such a conversation or behaved badly, you should not despair, at least the embarrassment at the sight of him will disappear, because it is obvious that he is not worthy of such an attitude, and the very reason for the embarrassment will simply disappear.
It is better to let the problem be resolved in this way than to continue, endlessly causing inconvenience and discomfort. We must remember that the problem of shyness in guys is not such a serious problem. The best solution would be not only to resolve it, but also to understand that this problem will not be the most difficult in life and to be happy if constraint is the only thing that worries you at the moment.
Not only girls feel shy when they see the person they like or all the guys; in general, guys are also susceptible to this. It happens that a girl and a guy are embarrassed by each other, not admitting their feelings, but the guy tries not to show it, putting on a mask of pomposity and swagger, and not even thinking about showing his true feelings.
Shyness is a normal human emotion and reaction to sensory experiences, however, it can greatly interfere with a young girl taking her first steps in the intimate sphere. In this case, it is better to overcome it, doing it gradually, you can also use the help of loved ones and trusted people.
In films and books, shyness looks extremely attractive, the young lady blushes, hides her eyes, thereby bewitching the guy. It is important to understand that in real life everything is much more complicated. It is difficult for a girl to build long-term relationships, because the constant search for flaws in her own appearance and behavior makes her closed. We are not talking about slight shyness, which is inherent in every lady, we are talking about excessive closeness and uncertainty.
How to learn to kiss for the first time
The main reason for fear is the possibility of doing something wrong. However, every reason for fear also has its original basis. Most often it is associated with the largest complexes. A person fears failure because of such thoughts:
- “I can be abandoned, rejected, left alone” (fear of loneliness, painful attachment);
- “He/she will tell everyone that I didn’t succeed” (depending on public opinion);
- “He/she finds out that I am incompetent and will start laughing at me” (low self-esteem);
- “I can't do everything right. There will be inaccuracies and mistakes in my movements. I still have little experience” (excessive perfectionism);
- “Then no one will want to kiss me” (fear of the future, exaggeration, unhealthy maximalism);
- “I will start laughing, crying, or acting strangely or repulsively” (rejection of my emotions, suppressing them, instead of controlling them).
To solve underlying problems, it is better to consult a psychotherapist. However, it is still possible to reduce worries so that they do not interfere with enjoying the process and feelings without the help of a specialist.
Conventionally, two methods of dealing with fear can be distinguished. Each of them is effective alone, but in combination they work even better. Below are the basic principles of these methods.
- Concentrate on breathing. In a stressful environment, a person begins to breathe intermittently, shallowly. If he tries to restore deep, measured breathing, he will feel better.
- Removing the block. Nervousness causes the abdominal muscles to tense and cause spasms. Because of this, unpleasant sensations arise (“sucking in the pit of the stomach,” nausea, stomach rumbling, bloating). To avoid them, just relax the point in the center under the ribs.
- Reduced tremor. Trembling and/or sweaty palms are a common sign of anxiety. To reduce the level of this phenomenon, you can tense your hands and fingers as much as possible for a few seconds, and then sharply relax them.
- Fighting stuttering. You don’t want to mumble, mutter something out of place, stammer or stammer in front of your passion. Therefore, it is better to wait one and a half to two seconds before each answer. This will be enough for the brain to group information and form an adequate response.
- Thoughts of the interlocutor. If this is the first kiss, then it is also exciting for the partner. And even for a person experienced in this matter. It is enough to realize the fact that the couple is also experiencing some confusion and worry, and it will become easier.
- Acceptance of any outcome. Often the fears in the head turn out to be much larger and more terrifying than they really are. You can think over your fears and make sure that they are not fatal, and that time does not stop running because of them.
- Confession. The short phrase “I’m a little worried” will help relieve tension, for both lovers. Many people find this kind of frankness quite endearing. This same sincerity forces others to open up, show trust, and generally become closer.
- Confidence. The most difficult, but most effective way is to increase self-esteem. Loving yourself means responding to stress more easily. The path to adequate self-perception is long and thorny. However, even attempts, small steps in this direction will be noticeable.
Where fears come from and how to deal with them is already clear. However, how to learn the technique of kissing? Explanations in words are not always clear. Moreover, sometimes they are even more confusing. Then in what ways can one comprehend this art?
Reasons for being shy in front of a guy
Parents have been known to mutilate their children to some extent. Some pamper them, others, on the contrary, scold them. Shyness begins in early childhood and continues with a person into adulthood.
Try to remember, were there any cases when your mother compared you with a classmate, saying that she was a better student, attended a music school and would achieve a lot in life, unlike you? It is precisely such actions that instill in the character of a little girl the fear of comparisons from relatives. You have heard this so often that the statements have become true for you, thereby lowering your self-esteem with each similar case.
Another example is this: when you were little, you probably screamed loudly or made noise in public places (like all children). At this moment, your parents began to shame you, saying, what a shame, people are looking at you. Such statements from the ancestors lie firmly in the memory, guiding future life. The child unconsciously begins to experience fear about what others will think. But it is important to understand that you are no longer a little girl; by and large, people don’t care how you behave or what you wear.
As for other adults, such as a teacher or teacher, they also do not always have a sense of tact. Often, teachers publicly speak out about the illiteracy of their students, shame them in front of the team, making the child feel untalented and inferior. This leads to shyness and lack of confidence in one’s own abilities, a person ceases to be a person in full, and individuality is lost.
If we talk about their peers, they are completely ruthless. Schoolchildren, children from a neighboring yard or a creative group constantly mock a person who is not like them. Perhaps you had freckles on your nose or chubby cheeks, which led to various nicknames. It is not uncommon for a girl to grow up and still remember all the teasing and insults regarding her appearance, physique or mental abilities. Understand that not everything people say is true.
Signs of shyness
- Shy girls often sweat, are afraid to express themselves loudly and constantly blush. Their heart beats quickly, their movements become abrupt and illogical, provoking awkward moments.
- Shy ladies do not look their interlocutor in the eyes; their thoughts are completely focused on imaginary incorrect actions or expressions. Girls fall into a stupor when talking with the opposite sex, trying to understand what thoughts are flying through their heads about them.
- In addition to the above, attentiveness is greatly reduced. Ladies constantly lose the point of the conversation, their brain works in slow motion, their memory becomes shorter. Girls quickly lose interest in what is happening.
Step #1. Show emotion.
When communicating with a young man, do not hesitate to speak frankly. Does your breath catch and your palms sweat when he looks like that? Report it. Believe me, not a single guy will remain indifferent after hearing such words. He will not perceive this as a flaw; the young man will find such behavior cute.
Step #2. Get some exercise.
Exercising helps release endorphins, which reduce tension, resulting in less awkward moments. Sign up for a gym or dance class, take a trial lesson in stretching, Pilates or kickboxing. Modern studios offer a lot of opportunities at an affordable price. With the help of physical activity, you will not only gain confidence, but also tighten your body, pump up your abs, and stop being shy about intimacy.
Step #3. Watch your appearance.
Neat girls are less shy; they are confident in their beauty and well-groomed appearance. Visit a manicure and pedicure specialist several times a month, cut off split hairs and touch up regrown roots. Don't skimp on your own beauty. Shy ladies do not visit salons; they prefer to remain in the shadows and be unremarkable. You can do something drastic by dyeing your hair a different color and changing the length of your hair.
Step #4. Be proactive.
Guys quickly get tired of everyday life and get bored with shy girls. To avoid this, become a proactive lady. Invite the young man to the cinema or organize a picnic in nature, go ice skating, or take a walk in the park. An important feature of this step is the complete exclusion of situations that could put you in an awkward position. Decide in advance on your makeup and hairstyle, choose beautiful and suitable clothes, and think about topics for conversation.
Step #5. Find out everything about intimate life.
A guy and a girl sooner or later start having sex. To avoid feeling shy in bed, learn everything about intimate life. There is a lot of information on the Internet, if this is not enough for you, visit the library or talk to experienced friends. Watch relevant films, study poses or look through magazines for girls. Information is power, and you need to prepare for such an event in advance to overcome embarrassment.
Step #6. Do something together.
Invite the guy to sign up for Latin American dancing, salsa, tango or other areas of his choice. This kind of art completely eliminates all complexes, since you work in pairs. It may be difficult and awkward at first, but after 2 weeks you will forget about being shy.
Step #7. Be interested in the guy's life.
Study the young man’s hobbies and main interests, try to delve into the details in order to skillfully maintain a conversation. To be more effective, ask his friends, brothers, sisters or parents about his favorite books and sports. When you are aware of events, you will automatically avoid awkward pauses in conversation due to your own ignorance. The conversation will go easily and naturally, and shyness will recede to the side.
Step #8. Meet the guy's family.
You will stop being shy the moment you meet the young man’s close people. If he has a brother or sister, invite them to sit together in a cafe, go to the movies, or just take a walk. More daring ladies are advised to meet their boyfriend's parents to ask his mother about his quirks and tastes in food. You'll feel much more confident when you cook your guy's favorite food. The method is suitable only for those girls who are good at using kitchen utensils.
Step #9. Engage in self-development.
Try to find some time for your own development, both spiritual and material. Have you ever wanted to attend a make-up course and work in your profession? Go for it! Is this direction not suitable? Take up drawing with an experienced teacher, sign up for piano courses, start learning a foreign language. Shyness will recede as soon as you get off the ground and begin to improve the skills you have acquired.
Step #10. Attend psychological training.
Personal growth courses will help girls living in big cities get rid of shyness. Experienced professionals will make you a confident person and will tell you what to pay attention to in a specific situation. There are trainings designed not for one lesson, but for an entire course. At the end of your last lesson, you will leave the building as a completely different person. An alternative to training is a session with a psychologist, but the cost per visit is much higher.
Are you shy about a guy? Stop it! Analyze your own childhood, exclude from adult life the complexes inspired by your parents. Visit the beauty salon regularly and take care of your appearance. Prepare mentally for intimacy, improve yourself, take personal growth courses.
How to learn to kiss correctly
YouTube is rightfully considered a storehouse of knowledge in this matter. All you have to do is type in the query “how to kiss correctly” - and the site will give you thousands of video tips. The advantage of this method is its clarity, because in the videos the kiss is shown up close, almost in cross-section. Although such rendered 3D graphic clips probably also exist.
The main disadvantage is the lack of practice and tactile sensation. But this can be easily dealt with by using the following recommendations.
Older brothers, sisters, and already “experienced” friends can come to the rescue. It is enough to ask them to demonstrate in detail the kiss with their couples. Or at least just show the basic movements of the lips and tongue, if the “teachers” are not in a relationship with anyone.
It’s better not to ask to show the technique on yourself. This, of course, will add to the experience, but, firstly, all the charm of the first time will disappear, and, secondly, awkwardness will appear and then it will be difficult to look into the eyes of an acquaintance or acquaintance.
This technique is quite simple, practical, but very effective. Procedure:
- leave the index and middle fingers straight and bend the rest towards the palm;
- spread your straightened fingers slightly to the sides - just a little, so that there is a small gap between them, equating to slightly parted lips;
- practice light kissing and biting. Try to gently lick the skin, checking whether too much saliva remains on it;
- try to gently close your lip with your fingers, imitating your partner’s movements;
- barely stick the pad of your thumb between two straight lines - this is a “model” of the tip of the tongue on which you can practice;
- if this is not enough, you can bend the little finger of the other hand and use it instead of the thumb, adjusting the degree of bend so that it imitates the width of the tongue.
The good thing about this method is that it includes theory and practice, is carried out on your own, and does not require an abstruse approach. A little imagination, a pinch of effort - and everything will work out.
The most common, still “old-fashioned” method is tomatoes. However, the skin of this fruit is not like lips. It is smooth, while the lips can be rough. The skin easily glides over the tomato, but with real contact, the lips rub, and if you don’t lick them, they can stick to each other.
Based on this, it is better to use a ripe, juicy peach. It is rough, softer on the outside and inside, vulnerable to rough movements, and also does not contain small seeds or seeds. It is enough to bite off a small piece, forming a small recess, similar to an open mouth. The main thing is not to overdo it and not develop an allergy.
Kissing requires close enough contact that the partner will not be able to see the whole picture of the action. However, he will notice jaw movements, head tilts, and facial expressions in general.
So that the facial expression says “I am the most kissable person in the world!”, and not “What a horror this first time is!” Now I’m going to faint!”, you can practice in front of the mirror.
First, the skill is honed with open eyes so that you can follow everything. Then, when the actions become more or less automatic, the eyes are closed, and all the steps taken are reproduced “blindly”.
Sometimes it's enough to just let go and let the event happen on its own. Reflexes will prompt the base, and then all that remains is to adapt to the movements of the couple or simply start mirroring them.
If this step seems too difficult, it may be better to postpone the first kiss. And time can be spent getting closer to your partner, overcoming a period of acute awkwardness. After crossing such a milestone, it will be much easier to decide on such an important romantic step.