Romantic
This version of a marriage proposal is universal. This is the method of marriage invitation that most young ladies dream of.
If the handsome prince is in no hurry to arrange a romantic evening and say the main words, some girls decide to do it themselves.
The main component of such a proposal is a romantic atmosphere and a corresponding mood. Classic attributes will help you create them.
Privacy is perhaps the most important condition. Be it your own apartment, a separate room in a restaurant, or a significant place for both - for example, where you met or kissed for the first time. What is important is the opportunity to be alone.
- Nothing will create a mood as quickly as mysterious twilight, flickering candles, and pleasant aromas.
- Men love with their eyes. Therefore, it definitely won’t hurt to take care of your appearance: hairstyle, makeup, his favorite dress.
- The way to a man's heart still lies through his stomach. Therefore, you can organize a light delicious dinner and drinks.
During a romantic rendezvous, love seems to be the only relevant topic.
The conversation on such an evening can be maintained in accordance with the general tone: about feelings, about the feeling of happiness that fills the soul, about the hope that these feelings will persist for many years - in the new, family role of your couple.
It is not uncommon for the strong half of humanity to delay registering a marriage for unknown reasons. And the girl is sure that she has found her soul mate and wants to connect her fate with him. In this case, you have to take the initiative into your own hands and think about how to propose marriage to a guy yourself.
What does it take to decide on an offer?
However, before you stun your man with a marriage proposal, you should find out whether he is ready for such a change in your relationship. Marriage is a serious step, so first you should consider that the reason for officially registering a relationship in a couple is mutual desire, and not other reasons. There is absolutely no point in insisting on marriage to save the relationship; nothing good will come of it. If there is no reason to doubt, it is time to do everything to make it happen.
Actions should be deployed carefully. Initially, it is best to find out how he feels about marriage. Discussion of such an issue should not concern the couple for the first time, but it is very important to find out what the guy thinks about this matter. Especially if the girl is seriously planning to propose to him.
Another important aspect is his vision for the future. If a guy talks about a couple meaning two people or the couple is planning to live together. In this case, you can always find a way to discuss further relationships and talk about a distant future together. This situation even gives confidence to take such a step as an offer.
What to consider?
When you decide to propose, keep in mind that you need to do it in such a way that the guy likes it. We are not talking about the banal “marry me”; every step should be thought through. If you propose in a restaurant, in front of a large number of people, it is ideal for a girl, but a man may not like such a move at all. Knowing your boyfriend, it’s better to make sure a hundred times that all possible knowledge is used.
An example of an original proposal could be a joint trip to his favorite fishing spot, where, while sorting out the gear, the guy comes across a note with the question: “Will you marry me?” Another proposal can be made at a performance of his favorite band, for example, when it comes to your city.
All these examples do not mean at all that it is not worth taking into account the girl’s wishes. After all, this day should be pleasant and memorable for both. After a fishing proposal, no one forbids visiting a cozy restaurant and having dinner by candlelight. The task is not easy, but you should try to find a middle ground.
Spontaneity in such a situation is not entirely a good thing, and to prevent anxiety from taking over, you need to carefully plan the proposal. The choice of location in this case should matter to both. This could be the place of a first date or a first kiss. These places have special significance, which means that the atmosphere there will be suitable for a proposal.
We must not forget about time.
It is optimal to choose a time when the guy is relaxed and definitely ready for big changes. And a proposal made during a football match or right after work will certainly not be successful. The accompanying mood is the key to a successful proposal.
If you wish, you can involve friends or family members, the main thing is that they should also prepare well and certainly not spoil the surprise prematurely.
His hobby will help him make an original proposal.
Such a non-standard move will also show support for his interests. However, when planning a proposal, it is best to keep the proposal as simple in essence as possible. Pleasant, reasoned words about the reasons why a girl decided to throw in her lot with this particular guy are always better than pretentious proposals. A text prepared in advance will help relieve anxiety and say it beautifully.
If a girl hears a proposal from a guy, she receives a ring as a gift as a symbol. In such a situation, you can choose something else as a gift. And knowing your chosen one, it would be better to choose what he likes, there may be a whole lot of options.
What could be the result?
Control of the result. On the appointed day and hour, no matter what happens, you should prepare for any surprise in advance. After receiving a positive response, the couple can discuss the future and even set a wedding date. It also happens that a guy needs to be given time to think; calmly this does not mean that he will say no. Perhaps he was completely unprepared for such a development of events. Let him think about it, after all, a proposal to get married is not a joke. Well, if the girl hears back, no, don’t panic. Upset feelings will appear in any case, but you should definitely ask the guy about the reasons for making such a decision. But no matter what it is, don’t be discouraged, maybe you are completely incompatible and are pursuing different life goals.
Interesting video for the article:
A marriage proposal has always remained a privilege that helped men become the husband of their beloved. But women had to suffer from love, not being able to express their feelings and be the first to take a step towards happiness.
According to legend, Saint Brigid received permission from Saint Patrick to set aside one day when women could propose to timid and shy men. The day when girls proposed marriage boldly and openly was February 29th. Queen Victoria was one of the first to take advantage of this opportunity and lived a long and happy married life with her husband.
Should you propose to a man?
Before you take such an important step, make sure you are ready to go for it. You risk not only being rejected, but also losing your loved one forever. The fact is that many men consider themselves “leaders”; they will not tolerate a woman near them who will put pressure on him, push him to make any decisions, and even more so decide for him when to think about starting a family. If your lover has a similar character, do not take risks; it is better to wait until he matures and proposes to you.
A man who does not propose his hand and heart to his woman for a long time is most likely not yet ready to get married. He believes that his time has not yet come. If you rush things, he may agree to get married, but you are unlikely to see a good and responsible husband in him.
If your boyfriend fits the description of your dream husband perfectly, but is too shy to make the first move on his own, then you might really want to consider proposing. In any case, it's up to you to decide.
How to prepare
It must be said right away that you can propose to a man only if there is confidence in reciprocity; the guy is simply extremely shy and timid. In another situation, you first have to find out everything about his intentions and plans. Perhaps the man simply does not want to get married. Why? There are many reasons, but most often:
- afraid of responsibility;
- does not want to lose freedom;
- not ready to babysit children;
- he is satisfied with the relationship he is in at the moment;
- simply already married (which he is silent about).
An excellent reason to start a conversation about marriage could be a proposal on his part to live together. You shouldn’t immediately talk about marriage and the obligatory trip to the registry office. After some time, you can carefully discuss with your partner the situation between a couple of close friends.
During the discussion, the girl gets the opportunity to find out how her lover feels about family life in general and marriage in particular.
You can unobtrusively start a conversation about children, without referring to the ones you have together.
You need to understand what a man’s opinion is about large families, how many children there should be in a family, whether, in his opinion, it is difficult to raise a child, and when (at what age) is it best to have children . Often women rush things and try to save shaky relationships with the help of marriage.
You shouldn't do this. Nothing good will come of such an idea. It is important to choose the right moment and propose to your loved one, having carefully thought through every word and every action. You can take advantage of the moment on the day when the anniversary of your acquaintance is celebrated.
Before taking such an important step, you should thoroughly prepare: think through your speech, choose the right words, create an environment appropriate for the event.
How not to behave
Having decided to be the first to voice her desire to get married, a woman should think about the possible consequences of the conversation. It is also worth remembering that any wrong step will make a man wary or even afraid. What actions can be considered wrong and what cannot be said? Each couple has their own answers to these questions:
- Is the man modest and timid? You can’t even try to propose marriage to him in a public place. The restaurant or cafe is canceled immediately. Seek solitude.
- Does a man depend on the opinions of his friends? You should not frighten him with the upcoming separation from his comrades due to the need to constantly be near his wife, saying that after the wedding the spouses are always and everywhere together.
- Is he an avid fisherman? You shouldn’t speak badly about his hobby and about all the other fishermen. You cannot ask him to make a decision about marriage while fishing. He gets distracted from his favorite hobby and only gets angry.
You need to think carefully before choosing a place for a serious and unexpected conversation.
How to make an unforgettable proposal
If you decide to take such a desperate step, first try to give him a few hints that you dream of becoming his wife. Maybe he will understand everything himself and run to the jewelry store to buy wedding rings. If everything remains as before, it's time to take on the heavy artillery.
A romantic marriage proposal can be made on the seashore. Warm sand, a gentle sunset and the sound of the surf encourage you to make incredible declarations of love. Have a small picnic, get your loved one in the mood for the right wave, and you can safely take this step.
You don't have to say the specific words "Be my husband." Show your imagination and write him a song or poem about love. These lines should clearly indicate that you want to spend your whole life with him. Give him such a postcard on the top of a mountain, near a magnificent waterfall, in a fashionable restaurant, or even in a hot air balloon. If it’s difficult for you to say it out loud, then poetry will come in handy.
A marriage proposal can be made unexpectedly and in a comic form. For example, call him during the day and offer to take time off from work to “run” to the registry office. Such a spontaneous proposal may please your lover.
The offer can be made in any way you like. Kissing him tenderly in the morning, or bringing him coffee in bed, relaxing at a resort, watching a movie about love, buying groceries in a store, or even skiing down a huge mountain. It depends on what kind of girls your man likes. Some people like romantic, gentle natures, while others like unpredictable, spontaneous, risky, even a little wild. The most important thing is to hear the cherished “yes” in response.
How to respond to rejection
Life doesn't always work out the way we would like. There are also difficult situations when you have to face unexpected refusal.
What to do and how to behave in this case? It all depends on how ready the woman was for such an ending. It is after refusal that many people have a kind of epiphany. The girl understands that she was in a hurry and her lover is not ready to accept her offer and take responsibility for the family.
Don't get upset right away! You need to try to pull yourself together and turn everything into a joke. Failed? Give the man time. He could simply be confused by surprise and a little later, having come to his senses, he would change his decision. Do you think everything is lost?
In this case, it is worth finding out why your loved one answered this way and not otherwise. Perhaps he did not intend to get married at all, and he is satisfied with such a relationship.
Maybe he thinks that marriage will only ruin everything that exists between you. Another way to come out of a situation with your head held high and faith in the best.
If until this day everything was going as well as possible, then you just need to give time for the relationship to move to another level.
All problems can be solved except for the case when, after the proposal is made, a woman finds out that her beloved is married and is not going to part with his family. In order not to find yourself in a difficult situation, you do not need to wait or even demand an instant answer from a man.
You can always give him time to think and present everything as if there was a desire to prepare him for the need to take a step and make a serious decision.
In this video there are several more creative options for proposing marriage:
Returning to the questions raised in the article, it must be said that for each couple there is its own solution and only its own way out, which the man and woman will have to look for together. What is the right thing to do? Should you propose to a man or is it better to wait until he makes a decision? It is important for girls and women seeking to take such an important and responsible step to know what others think about it. Perhaps someone has already had a similar experience in receiving a refusal, and someone began their family life with just such an offer. Every comment will be important and useful, the opinions of all readers will be taken into account.
3 parts:Planning a proposalPosing a questionCreative approach
You've decided that he's the One, and you're all dropping hints, but he just doesn't get them. You can try to push him in the right direction, but if that's not your style, why wait for a guy to ask that question? There is no reason why a woman can't be the one to propose.
Part 1 Planning the proposal
- Find out if you are ready for this next step.
Marriage is a big step and you need to be sure that you are taking the step for the right reasons, because you have found someone you honestly want to spend the rest of your life with, not because all your friends are getting married and you think you need it too.- If you want to get married because you are trying to "save" the relationship or because you are afraid of being alone, these are not reasons to get married. In fact, it's probably a good idea to let go of the relationship.
However, if you know for sure that marriage with this guy is what you want, then it's time to go for it and put your energy into making it happen.
- Talk about marriage and commitment with your boyfriend.
Discussing the issue should not be the first time the two of you discuss commitment and marriage. You don't necessarily have to talk about it from the perspective of the two of you (although you probably should), but it's important to get his thoughts on this very important thing, especially if you're considering proposing to him.- Notice how he talks about the future and what he says. If he talks about "we" and "us" (meaning the two of you) in future endeavors, if the two of you live together, have a shared pet, or you've moved somewhere together, then he's committed to you.
This doesn't necessarily mean he's ready for marriage or even wants to get married, but it's something you two should discuss.
- You might even find a way to talk about the relationship in general or bring it up to your shared concerns about the distant future. For example: “Becky proposed to Henry in front of his entire family, I think I would like to propose more quietly, what do you think?”
- Propose the way he would like.
When you plan to propose to a guy, you want to make sure that the proposal is about him, and in a way that he would like. Just because you wanted a fancy proposal in a fancy restaurant in front of everyone, that doesn't mean he would want the same. You know your boyfriend better, so make sure you use that knowledge.- For example, if he really loves fishing, plan a fishing trip with him and put a note in the box that says, “Will you marry me?”
Another example: If he's a big fan of a certain band, plan to propose during a show when the band is playing in your city (or go to a concert, even if it's far away).
- This does not mean that you should ignore yourself and your desires completely. The proposal should be something that is important and memorable to you as well. You just have to find some middle ground. For example, after fishing, you could continue your date with a candlelit three-course dinner at a beautiful restaurant.
- Plan your proposal.
Spontaneity is a great thing, but for something like a marriage proposal, you need to plan well so that you can stick to the plan even when you're nervous (because you'll be nervous, but that's expected!), especially if you're doing it big event, you must find out everything.- You will need to choose a specific place to raise the issue, preferably one that makes sense to both of you. It could be the place you went on your first date, or it could be the place where you had your first kiss. Choosing a location that makes sense for both of you works in two ways, firstly, it is already something special for the two of you, and secondly, it provides a great extension to your proposal!
Timing is everything. It's best to choose a time when he's relaxed and ready to make or think about big changes. It's less good to do this when he's stressed after work or school or is distracted by something else (for example, if you're both at a football game and he's paying more attention to the game than to you and what you're trying to ask).
- You need to make sure that the mood directly matches what you are about to do. It could be something as simple as lighting a few candles or drinking some nice champagne, or having a whole fancy dinner. You will have to consider what is important to the two of you.
- If you want to involve other people in your proposal (children, family members, friends, animals), you need to make sure that they know what they should do and when, and especially that they should keep quiet about it so as not to spoil the surprise.
Part 2 Statement of the question
- Use his hobbies.
Again, when you're thinking about how to ask him, think about his hobbies and interests and use them as a way to make the proposal special. Not only will this show that he is important to you (since you are, after all, asking him to marry you), you will also show that you are aware of his interests and that you support them.- For example: if he is interested in archaeology, offer to volunteer for an archaeological dig with him and propose at the dig (you can enlist your fellow volunteers to help). Or you could even make the proposal a treasure hunt and have him dig up the proposal in the backyard.
- Ask the question privately.
Every romantic comedy has a scene where one person proposes to another, and it's always in front of a group of people, but especially for a guy, it's best to do it in private (unless he specifically said he wants to be proposed to in front of a group of people). ).- This way, it gives him the opportunity to think about the proposal without the pressure of a bunch of people waiting for his decision. After he says yes, don't hesitate to announce it loudly.
- Keep it simple.
Even if you're planning a complex proposal (a sky extravaganza or a scavenger hunt), try to keep the actual proposal simple and to the point. What you really need to do is tell him why you want to spend the rest of your life with him and ask if he wants to do the same with you. You'll be nervous (because who wouldn't) so keeping it simple will help you remember what you're going to say.- Prepare a few lines to quote. You could say something like, “We have so many amazing memories... From now on, I want you to be in ALL my memories,” and propose. Or, on the eve of the day, say, “This wonderful day is planned for us, but I just can't wait... I want us to spend it together as more than just boyfriend and girlfriend,” and then propose.
- Give him a symbolic gift.
You'll want to give him something symbolic, like an engagement ring, but it doesn't have to be a ring, especially if he's not the ring wearer. You know your boyfriend better, so you'll have to decide what the gift should be, but there are many options.- You can gift him a wristwatch or a pocket watch because they are sometimes seen as a masculine form of jewelry anyway. You can even engrave both your names to make it more special.
You could make something handmade for him, like a box containing all your favorite memories or a ceramic plate that asks him to marry you.
- If he's the type to wear necklaces, you could give him an engagement necklace, maybe even one with a ring on it.
- Engraved lighters are also often used as engagement gifts for men (or women), and this can be very cool and attractive.
- Know how to deal with the consequences.
Since you can't control the outcome, proposing to someone can be very nerve-wracking and make you feel vulnerable. This is no reason not to do it, but you should be prepared for any eventuality.- If he says yes, great! It's time for a party. You may or may not set a wedding date and decide that it will happen sometime in the future (you don't have to get married right away just because you're engaged).
Just because he needs time to think doesn't necessarily mean he's going to say no. The proposal might just take him by surprise and he really needs to think about what it would mean. Let him do it. If he doesn't get back to you, talk to him about the offer and his concerns.
- If he says no. You will feel upset, and you have every reason to ask him why and whether he will ever change his mind. This could simply be because he has too much going on lately (school, a big move, his parents are sick) and he can't think about the distant future, or it could mean he doesn't want to get married. Whatever the reason, you will have to come up with several options for your future. It's possible that the two of you are not compatible and have different life goals.
Part 3 Creativity
- Have a treasure hunt.
This could be a treasure hunt to all the places in your city that are important to you, or a treasure hunt related to some of his hobbies. There is no wrong way to do a treasure hunt (unless it's too hard and he can't complete it). He will have a wonderful time and will be in a cheerful mood thanks to the last hint (suggestion).
- Make a food-related offer.
Many people will enjoy a good offer that involves food (unless he accidentally eats the offer, eventually!). There are many ways to use food to make a marriage proposal fun.- There are ways to make personalized fortune cookies. You could make one that says "Will you marry me?" and make sure it's mixed when you pick it up (or if you make some fine Chinese food).
Hide a note and a symbolic engagement gift (not necessarily a ring) in the background of the deli box and give it to him. Again, make sure he doesn't eat the note or gift by mistake.
- Propose with pumpkin carving.
During Halloween, go to a pumpkin arcade and challenge your boyfriend to a pumpkin carving contest. While he's distracted, cut to, "Will you marry me?" on your pumpkin and show him when you're both finished carving. You will probably win the competition then.
- Propose using extreme sports.
Obviously this isn't for everyone, but if you and your boyfriend are extreme sports pros, this is a great way to pop the question. You'll likely need help from your friends or instructors, so make sure they don't give out the game in advance!- Go skydiving with your boyfriend and ask your friends to write a sign below asking him to marry you.
Go diving and prepare a waterproof sign on the ocean floor for your boyfriend to find when he swims with you.
Reasons why you won't get married
If a man really likes a woman, he will not hesitate. According to statistics, most marriage proposals are made in the first year of a relationship. If the premarital period has been prolonged for you, it may be the following:
Time
Some men are very “good at settling in.” But the problem here is not with them, but with you. It is you who cook him borscht, wash his socks and provide him with regular sex for free. The man thinks: I feel good with her, why should I call her down the aisle? And the woman waits until the chosen one finally matures, never tired of surrounding him with love, care and affection.
If it's a matter of time, look at the experiences of successful entrepreneurs. Not a single businessman, seeing that his business can no longer be saved, will resuscitate the business. He would rather think about what else he can invest in, what startup to launch this time. It's the same in relationships. If he didn’t ask you to get married in the first year, he’s unlikely to ask you in subsequent years.
Stress
There is no way to avoid worries in the modern world; try to minimize them. Some girls exaggerate their own problems so much that you can feel it after the first 5 minutes of conversation. Stop complaining to a man about your difficult lot - there is a psychologist for this, or, in extreme cases, your best friend.
Competition
The older the girl, the lower her energy rating, and the less valuable she is considered on the marriage market. This is one of the main problems why women are not married. And many young ladies deliberately build a career before the age of 30, believing that it is too early for them to start a family. When such a woman comes to her senses, it turns out that men are no longer very interested in her.
Dominance and pushing your opinion
No guy will like it if his chosen one takes a masculine position in a relationship - she begins to command, or even suppress, intellectually humiliate. By the way, this is one of the reasons why overly smart women are not married. Know-it-all girls strive to outdo their partner or prove that they are right in an argument. But all they have to do is read the articles in the “Ideal Love Relationships” section, and the chosen one runs to buy a ring.
Quick consent to everything
Often those men to whom you offered yourself on a silver platter from your previous meetings often delay proposals and abandon them. They quickly agreed to have sex or admitted their feelings early. Many women are so afraid of missing out on their “female happiness” that they agree to any obscene proposal from a guy, or build castles in the air and quickly fall in love. At the same time, men lose interest in them.
You can also learn about the mistakes that prevent people from getting married in my article “4 Reasons Why a Man Asks for Marriage, but Never Gets Married.” We will move on to the next question - we will discuss which girls are highly valued by men.