How to choose the right man. Important! Science has proven that our female DNA does not have a built-in algorithm for searching and choosing a partner. This is very difficult for women. We do not have enough strength, energy, or determination. Therefore, describing a portrait of the man of your dreams is simply meaningless for women. This is more of a masculine linear way. Men know what kind of woman they want to see next to them and what kind of woman they want to see as the mother of their children, so that their genetics will be embodied in the best possible way.
We have a different task, from a biological point of view. We need to choose a partner with whom we would feel safe for ourselves and our offspring. And from this point of view, it is clear why love was conceived by nature. It's like a woman's way of tying a man down for a better life for her children.
Of course, in the modern world, when quite a lot of women are able to take care of themselves, their children, and even men, this seems unnecessary. But, from the point of view of physiology and biology, there are no changes at all. We are the same as we were hundreds of thousands of years ago. And we are controlled by the same instincts, which evolve more slowly than the world changes. Every woman is endowed by nature with a simply ingenious solution that allows her and her offspring to adapt to external conditions.
How to choose the right man. We do not search and do not choose. We sift and filter.
That is, our thinking is structured in such a way that when we look at a man, we think not about how to give him away faster, but about what he has in him to refuse him. Therefore, all ideas on HOW TO CHOOSE A MAN RIGHT and hunting for men are contrary to nature itself and cause neuroses in women. The very path of femininity is to simply be attractive to men and have a choice.
Just think how ingenious and natural this is! And our critical look at men is exactly the right process.
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You look and think, “What’s wrong with him? Why should I be with him? What defects and shortcomings does it have? “Do I want him just because I’m ovulating? Or do I like it on other days too? ;)" And only then, understanding the whole objective picture, understanding and seeing a man as he is, you ask yourself, "And given all this, do I want to give him up? Do I want to entrust myself and my offspring to him?”
This, by the way, is characteristic not only of women; many animals’ s@mki filter out s@m’s in the same way. It’s clear that only after a man has passed all the tests of your “filtering” are you ready to trust him. Moreover, these tests can take place both at a conscious and, most likely, at an unconscious level. Once he has shown his readiness, you let him into your life.
This was all from the point of view of biology and physiology. But you and I are social and conscious creatures. Therefore, many different components intervene in natural selection. And the choice of women is very much biased in favor of the social. A huge number of women come to me precisely with the desire to marry a wealthy and successful man. The very idea of marrying a rich man seems to fit into the general system of security and survival of the family.
BUT…
There is indeed a very strong “but” in the criteria and choice of this particular path. I’m not talking about women from the “cute and heaven in the hut” category and for whom it is enough that he “doesn’t drink or beat.” I understand perfectly well that women’s ambitions are a natural process of development, both for a woman and for her man. Therefore, many see the result of satisfaction in the search for a wealthy partner.
I have been convinced more than a hundred times that this is almost always a losing option.
How many times do I hear similar stories, when a man meets a woman in a luxury Lexus or a luxury Mercedes, they have sex right in the same car, and then it turns out that it’s a car on credit or the boss’s. And marriage, because the man has a house, which, as it turned out later, is the house of his older brother. And a luxurious apartment, expensive gifts, and then it turns out that the person is superficial, he always has a new woman, and an emptiness sets in, in which you understand that you will never be the only one for him.
How to choose a gift for a man? Basic secrets and tricks
It is known that there is a huge assortment of gifts for men, but most of them are already boring and stereotypical. Men most often buy lighters, purses, ties, watches or eau de toilette. And, indeed, it is quite difficult to surprise a representative of the stronger sex with a gift.
Often choosing a gift becomes a real problem. After visiting several stores and being disappointed in all the ideas, some give up and go buy something just to buy it. After all, I don’t have the strength to continue shopping.
The process of choosing a gift depends on a huge number of factors, including:
- the role of a specific person in the life of the giver (friend, relative, boss or just an acquaintance);
- age;
- reason for the gift: birthday, anniversary or anniversary;
- the recipient has interests or hobbies;
- occupation, profession;
- the presence of certain stylistic or color preferences, clothing size (mainly, a wardrobe item is given only to close people or good friends who can appreciate and understand the gift);
- the amount of money that can be spent on a gift.
What to give to men?
It is known that it is undesirable for representatives of the stronger sex to be presented with sweets, even if everyone knows that the person has a passionate sweet tooth. It is advisable to present gifts made with your own hands only if the donor is truly a master and has enough talent for this. Otherwise, such handicraft will be regarded solely as a reluctance to spend money.
In reality, representatives of the stronger sex are quite impressionable and suspicious, although they often hide it, so a real gift for men should not have an ambiguous meaning. For example, anti-dandruff shampoo would be a bad gift, as it could be interpreted as a hint. Similar hints are hidden in gym memberships, CDs or books “Learning Politeness” or “Stop Being a Loser,” as well as car air fresheners.
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She chose only outwardly attractive and athletic men, and then realized that the man was emotionally unbalanced and immature, and was not going to change his bachelor lifestyle for her. And most women, when choosing men, concentrate their attention. Does he have a car, an apartment, education, experience in relationships with women, taste and style in clothing, appearance.
And this is very sad!
When I was in London, I was simply amazed at what women came up with to get into the elite club Kitsch, and the main goal was to leave with one of the men that same evening in order to amaze him with striptease and sexual prowess and tie him up in this way to yourself. It ALWAYS ended in nothing. Or there was no sex at all. Or the man just fucked this girl, thanked her and never called again.
Men are not as stupid as many women want them to be. And although the main driving force for men is sex, they choose a partner for a long-term relationship based on more than one criterion.
And women need to filter more carefully. Understand that a lot depends on your choice. Yes, almost everything can be corrected, including an unsuccessful marriage and dissatisfaction with relationships and unnecessary casual sex.
But what is important to really pay attention to is the potential of the individual.
A woman can always explain to a man why a Porsche Cayenne is better than a metro. And a house is better than an apartment. And why travel is more enjoyable than TV.
But that's a different job. This needs to be learned. The male way doesn't work here. Here you need to learn to inspire, you need to be valuable so that a man wants to do everything for you. You love him, you don’t ask, but you have desires and ambitions. And he understands the value of your love for him and you personally. He understands that it is you who show him a better life, a new quality. And it is important for him that his genetic lineage evolves. And that’s exactly why he needs you.
A man will always find a way to satisfy all your needs. Both in sex, intimacy, and in the material world. I would not like to talk about the criteria for choosing a man. In fact, they don't exist. But there is something I want to focus on.
1. It is important to understand that intelligence, the ability to concentrate on a specific task, responsibility, interest, the ability to complete a task, the desire to grow and develop (in one’s field) are very important qualities for determining a man’s potential.
His attitude towards life in general.
Is he a pessimist or an optimist?
In fact, this is not so important for career and self-realization. But living with a pessimistic person may not be so comfortable. You just realize it and don't change it.
One woman told me how she showed love to her husband. She believed that she was giving him LOVE. Every morning for 18 years she told him “Good morning, my love!” To which he answered her, muttering under his breath, “It’s never a good morning!”
And so she was proud that after 18 years he began to answer “Good morning!”
How to choose the right man for varied communication
Let's assume that a woman does not dream of a serious, long-term relationship that turns into a family one. This doesn't mean you want trouble. What to do? Observe and analyze! A person always talks a lot about himself, verbally and non-verbally, you just need to learn to hear and understand. So what should you pay attention to?
- Having bad habits.
There is no point in getting involved with a person who is drawn to the forbidden - drugs, crime. It smacks of masochism. A healthy psyche will not mess with this. A gambling addict or a drinking man should also pass by, no matter how hard he tries to touch the strings of a woman’s heart. And even a heavy smoker will not be happy. Such people are usually extremely nervous and irritable. And relationships, even short-term ones, should bring pleasure.
And yes - how many times have they told the world! But there is still a woman who is convinced that no one could do it before her, but she will definitely be able to change, correct, help, lead to the right path. Once again - it won’t change, won’t correct, won’t help, won’t help! Running is the only sure way out.
- Own way.
A real man needs an interlocutor, a girlfriend, a muse, and not one who will shoulder the burden of his problems. But there are men who hope to solve their problems with the help of relationships - domestic, material, sexual. How to understand? He will talk about his problems, and in such a way that your heart aches, you want to wipe away your tears and help. He blames his parents, friends, the government, and the world as a whole for all his failures. Victim of circumstances. Immature child. It hasn’t grown yet, and it won’t grow now.
- Attitude towards people.
With a woman he likes, a man will behave perfectly, hiding behind a peacock's tail. It is worth observing how he treats other people - friends and family, strangers. If he behaves rudely and contemptuously with them, he will soon behave in the same way with a woman. No need to wait.
- Attitude to money.
An accomplished man calmly spends money on a woman. No, he doesn’t take financial responsibility, but he won’t say that he won’t order a dish in a restaurant because it’s expensive. If I said so from the beginning of our acquaintance, what will happen next?
- Attitude to sex.
He won’t force her into bed on the first or second date, respecting other people’s aspirations and desires. And when it comes to this, he tries to make her feel good. He's cool! The issue of sexual compatibility is one of the main ones. And he simply must decide as positively as possible for both.
- Smell.
No matter how spiritual a person may be, he remains a creature of flesh. And here are our own laws. As you know, every person, when starting a conversation, immediately identifies the interlocutor and assigns him to one of the parties - his own or someone else's. If you are a stranger, nothing will come of communication. If yours, there is a future. So smell is one of the selection criteria. If a woman doesn't like the smell of a man, nothing will help. The relationship is doomed.
- Interests and hobbies.
Despite the fact that people are different, and even more so men and women, there should be similarities in hobbies. Otherwise there will be nothing to talk about, interest will quickly subside. For a relationship, losing interest means the end, or at least the beginning of the end. You can learn about a hobby on the first date; as a rule, men like to talk about it.
- Personal boundaries.
Failure to respect one’s own or other people’s boundaries immediately and definitely leads the relationship downward. Easy to understand. If a man does not listen to a woman, does not hear her, insists on his own, despite resistance, he violates her boundaries. If he repeats that he will do whatever she wants - his. Dangerous.
- Individual qualities.
Assertive optimists do not always correctly assess the real situation and get into trouble. In which the woman is also drawn. Pessimists create around themselves a gray and dull world in which everything is bad and unfair. It's also contagious. But humor is what helps to cope with difficulties and gets out of a dead end. Good help for relationships.
The ability to sympathize, listen, take part in a woman’s life, and be frank yourself are wonderful qualities that will strengthen the union.
- Focus on the spiritual.
If the relationship develops, then it is better to rely on the spiritual, rather than on the material and physical. Relationships that value spirituality are more likely to succeed.
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When I asked her: “Why didn’t you try all this time to leave him alone until he sorted out his own morning?” She answered me: “I wanted to teach him to love.” She remained silent and understood everything. Woman, smart. I brought passion back into the relationship simply by seeing my partner’s needs.
Your intuition and attraction.
This is a very, very important selection criterion.
But..
If you really like a man, but all your acquaintances, friends, his friends say that you are “not a couple.” Take a closer look. What exactly do you not notice and will you be able to get along with it in the future? And vice versa. If you don’t like a man at all, but everyone says that this is just an ideal option. Give him a chance. Well, give love, receive love, and let this world become a better, happier and kinder place through you and your happy relationships. Put “LIKE” and write in the comments what filtering criteria you use.
