Sometimes it seems that men don't always like romance in relationships. But women are wrong about this. Men, like women, value attention and love surprises and gifts. They just express their emotions differently. They behave more restrained than women, who are much more emotional in their behavior.
What do men like? What can you do to please them? Find out below from the article.
Pleasant surprises
There is no need to run out and buy an expensive gift. A surprise can be pleasant even if it is terribly banal. For example, ask him out on a date, and present it in an interesting way.
You can also cook something very tasty that you have never tried before. Give a small gift, but one that will be remembered for a long time. At the same time, you should remember your emotions; you should give gifts with a sincere smile. Then the memories of him will be remembered for a long time.
"Dear Friend": love and marriage in the 19th century
The highest need of the bourgeois 19th century was a new status of gender relations, sanctioned by official marriage. It is not love that leads to marriage, but, on the contrary, marriage leads to love, and marriage of convenience becomes pronounced. The only exception is marriage in the work environment, although in this case with reservations. In general, people get married because it is much cheaper to run a household together. Never has the commercial nature of love manifested itself so clearly as in the 19th century. The merchant wants to open an independent business, so he marries a girl with a rich dowry. The other is heavily in debt, and the most discussed solution is to marry a woman with money. The third wants to make a career without putting in a lot of effort, and so he takes a wife with connections or capital, or even better, both together. Woman is money - Woman is money.
Edmund Blair Leighton "Registration of Marriage"
A woman is also guided primarily by calculation. She exchanges her money and beauty for position in society. She capitalizes her relatives in the form of a strong secure existence. If the calculation is justified, then everything turns out well. In this case, the chosen one is a beauty, a good housewife, has all the feminine virtues, and the husband is a wonderful person, a prominent entrepreneur, a handsome man, etc. Thus, ethical hypocrisy is covered by an illusion created by him.
19th century ball
Previously, various balls and salons were the only public fairs of love trading. And in the 19th century, connections were often made at such events, mockingly called “meat markets.” However, increasingly this role is taken on by professional intermediaries, who are informed of their special wishes and who do the most delicate preliminary work, namely, ascertaining the possible chances, making reliable inquiries about the property, family, character, physical disabilities or merits of the persons concerned. Thus, the marriage enterprise itself receives a more solid basis than with a casual personal acquaintance.
Balls and salons were public fairs of love trading
Makovsky K. E. Down the aisle
The genre of marriage advertisements appears. In one issue of the Berliner Tageblatt the following three queries once appeared, along with many other similar queries: 1) “A Jew, 30 years old, wants to marry a representative of a large Berlin manufacturer of blouses and dresses...”; 2) “Landowner, 40 years old, Evang. Religion, seeks acquaintance with a wealthy lady, especially if she is a landowner...”; 3) “An educated administrator from a very good family, a former manager of large estates, healthy, tall, slender, stately, 38 years old, not very rich, wants to enter into correspondence with an educated lady, a lover of nature, for the sake of marriage and the purchase of an estate... "
In the 19th century, the genre of marriage advertisements appeared
Marriage announcement
Usually the woman is portrayed as the victim in such a marriage, although in fact the man is just as often the victim. In the background one can already see the act of revenge that the sold beauty is thinking of committing one day over the old “money bag”. Coquetry serves as a woman’s most important weapon in the struggle for a man. If the forms of this art of seduction have become more decent, this does not prevent the fact that some of them have become more refined. As proof of this, we can recall such two weapons of seduction as perfume and negligee.
Perfume shop
Perfume belongs to the field of coquetry, as it should draw the attention of a man to a woman, influencing the psycho-emotional perception of the opposite sex. An intelligent lady (and perfume in the 19th century, undoubtedly, is a weapon of women of the propertied classes) reveals with the help of perfume very cleverly and often very clearly her individuality, inclinations and pretensions and at the same time forces a man to adapt to her in his behavior.
A completely new form of negligee of the 19th century - a bathing suit that arose along with the resorts and resort life that came into fashion. This is, to a certain extent, real, and not just an artificial negligee (like the rich decoration of women's underwear), in which one can appear in public, and therefore the most exquisite forms have been invented in this area over time. A bathing suit was supposed to feel like a second skin, and a woman was allowed to be naked in it. In fashionable resorts, life served largely only this purpose, and bathing for many women was just an excuse.
Bathing suits, 1863−1864
Flirting - a new fashion of the 19th century
Flirting is a new fashion of the 19th century. If anything contributes to the development of flirtatious tendencies to enormous proportions, it is the increasing tendency to reduce marriage to a simple arithmetic problem. Flirting becomes, as it were, an anticipated reward for the lack of erotic pleasures in a conventional marriage. An equally important role is played by the fact that in the propertied classes, men on average now married later, and therefore society recognized flirting as its right to exist. In secular society it was considered completely natural if every girl flirted. In Marcel Prevost’s novel “Demi-vierges” it is said: “In the girl’s eyes he read her consent. He carried her into the room like a prize. Pressing their lips to each other, they sank onto the bed on which Maud had already rested twice over the course of four years, without ever losing her innocence.”
In the propertied classes, flirting does not encounter any special obstacles, but it finds great incentives for its development and prosperity, especially among women, who in most cases are not engaged in anything serious. Therefore, they often have no other need than to make their life as pleasant as possible. Flirting thus becomes their most important life task, their occupation from morning to evening.
A man doesn't have enough sex. What a woman should know
There are many ways to please each other, despite any problems in health or in life, so if a man needs sex more often, it is better to follow his lead, and he will love you much more. If you don't want this, he can find a replacement for you or even divorce you. He will get it in all possible cases: from watching porn on the Internet, to meeting women on the street, all this will end sadly in any case.
For many women, sex is a separate item in the schedule of family life, so they often have to do it. It happens that the wife does not want her husband. Not everyone has opened up their sexual side, and considers it more of an obligation to a man. This is their main mistake, sex should bring pleasure, it cannot be done under duress, it will not be beneficial.
It’s great if people agree on temperament, then there are no barriers for them. In this case, the woman knows when a man lacks sex and how to make up for it. There will be no taboo topics or problems for her; she will always meet her partner halfway.
Not beauty or figure: 3 famous men told what they expect from women
As soon as women don’t try to attract the men they like! All means are used, including prohibited ones: new outfits, jewelry, tons of cosmetics, plastic surgery, intrigue, setups, deception.
Or maybe, in fact, everything is much simpler and it’s worth listening to the men themselves, finding out who they want to see next to them? And everything will become clear immediately. You just need to listen not to everyone at once, but to the specific object of your sighing. The stronger sex is still different. Although for some reason it is customary to think otherwise. Here are a few quotes from famous men about women, relationships and, of course, their loved ones.
“Women who only know how to love are boring. Much more interesting are those who also know how to hate.” - Oscar Wilde
So - a writer, a knight, a poet, a philanthropist, but the man lacked adrenaline. Do you think that if he lived 250 years ago, there are no such people in our time? There are plenty of men who need a shake-up every now and then. Not real hatred, but strong emotions for sure. Otherwise, they calm down, sour, fade away, and then go looking for what they want on the side. Moreover, no matter what kind of woman is next to them.
A girlfriend can be of unearthly beauty, with the character of an angel and loves him immensely. What is he missing? But this very thing is the difference in potential in relationships. This is, for example, if you eat a delicious, sweet cake for a very long time, then in the end you will want a pickled cucumber. And if this same cucumber is sometimes not given, then it begins to feel sick, nauseating, and that same irresistible desire appears.
And what should those women who received such a copy do? First of all, understand that you can’t go against nature - their men are good, it’s just their nature. You will have to argue with them from time to time, arrange small scandals with breaking dishes, go on extreme rides, like bungee jumping or parachute jumping.
Give him the opportunity to relieve not only physical, but also psychological stress. And if this lifestyle is a burden for you, then it makes sense to think about changing your partner. This means that you are completely different and everyone can be happy, but only separately.
“It’s not enough to be beautiful, thin and young. To conquer a man, you have to be unusual. And this unusualness should coincide with him, like no one before her and never in his life. If the situation is correct, then in this case it does not matter whether you are young or old, rich or poor. But this happens rarely,” Roman Trakhtenberg
Keywords - this rarely happens. The actor spoke in other words about true love, about how two halves of one whole found each other. And this really doesn’t happen often, so that just like that, everything coincides. And it’s not all about rags and appearance. They usually say about such couples: “What did he see in her?” Or, on the contrary: “Beauty and the Beast.” And they don’t understand how they can be together, they are so different. And they feel good and don’t care about all the talk.
But, unfortunately, such a meeting cannot be arranged on purpose. And you can’t paint unusualness on your face. The only advice is to live an interesting life, do what you like, and the rest is up to you. Moreover, it has long been noticed that the less we think about men, the more of them there are hovering around. What if, among this swarm, there will be the one, the only one with whom your unusualness coincides 100%? Therefore, communicate, love, break up, live. The main thing is to do everything with pleasure.
“I don’t need a beautiful wife; for money I can give her any appearance. I don't need a rich one. I already have everything. I don't need affectionate. Almost all women become such for the sake of my money, and those who do not become so, I can win. I need a decent wife. “No amount of money in the world can buy me loyalty and a good reputation,” Al Pacino
Only a person who has lived a stormy life, has money, has been disappointed in women more than once and understood a lot for himself could speak out like this. Wisdom and cynicism. Well, there are such men. Remember the expression “Honor above all”? For them, loyalty is above all. And only from the woman’s side. No, they themselves are ready to be faithful, but only if they fall in love without memory. Otherwise, alas, you will have to be just a beautiful entourage for a gentleman for whom his reputation is worth much more than the happiness of the woman who is nearby.
If you are ready to devote yourself to serving one person. If family comes first for you. If you are ready not to be the center of the universe for him. Too many ifs. It's difficult with people like that. Although there is nothing wrong with fidelity itself if it is mutual.
How many men - so many opinions, desires, preferences. And when you fall in love and want to win his heart, take the first step - find out what your chosen one needs. Perhaps this is exactly what you already have.
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Late marriage for men
Scientists have been able to determine that marriage is not at all as important for mature women as it is for men. For a man, marriage is salvation; it is beneficial for them to have a wife who will do housework, cook food, take care of her husband and much more.
At the same time, while the husband is relaxing on the couch and waiting for dinner, the wife is suffering from the stress and strain that has fallen on her. For such a woman, marriage will cause nothing but frustration, because most of her life has already been lived, and she herself is not in particularly good health.
It's worse in marriage than before marriage. Why do women leave
Why does a woman who consented to marriage give birth to a child from this man initiate a divorce.
I analyzed the experience of my acquaintances, friends, opinions from communities on social networks, and came to this not very good opinion.
A woman is worse off in marriage than before marriage.
It's sad but true: if a woman is worse off in marriage than outside of marriage, she will leave.
Yes, yes, in marriage a woman feels more unhappy than when she is free.
Therefore, such a seven falls apart.
Why? Most often for these reasons.
The woman gave birth to a child and is on maternity leave. There is no help from her husband; she has a child, a house, and perhaps even a part-time job. Solves all problems that arise, plus the husband’s complaints. And the woman makes a difficult decision for herself that, all things being equal, it will be easier for her without a husband.
The woman returned from maternity leave to work. She works equally with her husband, but the entire second shift is housework and all the children's issues are on her. Plus, the husband is unhappy that she does not pay enough attention to him. And the woman comes to the conclusion that, all other things being equal, it will be easier for her without a husband.
The man married a cheerful, laughing girl who takes care of herself. The wife gave birth to a child and became a “household clown”, “fresh”, “dull”. The husband went left. Seeing such an attitude towards herself, nagging, a woman concludes that it will be easier for her without a husband.
The woman got married and, by mutual consent, took up housekeeping. Or went on maternity leave. Not the point - the man became the main breadwinner in the family. Feeling his power over his wife, the man began to reproach her with lipstick and tights. And if the wife is on maternity leave - unkemptness, lack of attention to him and defilement. The wife makes a difficult decision that it will be better for herself.
Before marriage, a woman had a good life. Everything is stable and interesting. She feels like a full-fledged person and ready for a family. Marry. Being married, in addition to work, demands on everyday life have become more complicated. And when a woman gives birth to a child, she understands that in this situation it will be easier for her with a child and without a husband than with a husband.
My husband cheated. Changes. Considers this normal. The woman believes that cheating is a betrayal and files for divorce.
Hundreds, thousands of stories from women, different stories, different motives, it all comes down to one thing: before marriage, a woman’s life was simpler than after.
In marriage, I had to deal with the partner’s demands on the woman herself, on her way of life. Perhaps there was not enough money, the woman went on maternity leave and saw the dark side of the once beloved man. The woman felt unhappy; life simply became more difficult.
I would like to say to those men who complain that women themselves destroy families: make the life of your spouse better than it was before marriage, then the family will be strong and full of warmth and love.
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