How to congratulate your ex-love on her birthday beautifully

Does separation mean a complete break in “diplomatic relations”, how appropriate are congratulations to exes on their birthdays, how to congratulate your ex on his birthday - read on sympaty.net.

The question arises: Should I wish my ex a happy birthday?

Answer from “Beautiful and Successful”: you do not have such a responsibility, but if you sincerely would like to do it, there is nothing wrong with that.

When is it appropriate to congratulate your ex?

Congratulating your ex-love on her birthday is appropriate in a number of cases, for example:

You have children together, you constantly interact for this reason, and you have developed a certain non-conflict attitude towards each other. Therefore, congratulations here are quite understandable.
After the breakup, you remained in some kind of common get-together (in a wide circle of mutual friends, in the same work team, etc.), and periodically intersect. Here you don’t have to strive to beautifully congratulate your ex on his birthday, but it’s worth doing it at least in words. If you don’t correspond, then you can simply congratulate them on the past birthday at some chance meeting.
It so happened that you remained friends. In this case, you can approach the congratulations as sincerely as possible - express some wishes that are especially relevant to this person. For example: “I wish you to finally buy a car/finish a house/start working in a field that you have long liked,” etc.

In what cases should you not congratulate your ex-husband or boyfriend?

Your reluctance is a sufficient reason not to do this. In the end, we are talking about a person with whom the relationship has ended - and you don’t have to think about him even on holidays.

You shouldn’t write formal congratulations to long-lost people once a year - such an ex-boyfriend doesn’t need you just as much as you don’t need him.

Between colleagues, if this is customary in the team, the exchange of gifts will be appropriate

You especially shouldn’t congratulate those who treated you badly or continue to plot intrigues after the breakup: they persecute you, accuse you, spread rumors, etc.

What to give if you decide that it is necessary?

So, you decided to wish your ex-lover a happy birthday. How to decide whether to give something or limit yourself to SMS in the messenger?

It is logical to focus on how he congratulates you on your holidays, and make the return congratulation “symmetrical” in terms of cost and “fussiness.” But there may be nuances here too. For example:

You didn't invite your ex-man to your birthday party, but he invited you and you're going to go. Then you need to prepare a gift, even if you were not given any present.
The ex-husband lives on a much grander scale than you, and therefore gave you worthwhile gifts, and for your budget, a similar amount for a gift to your ex would be too significant. There is no need to spend excessively - you are not obliged to go to significant expenses in order to maintain a peaceful relationship with your ex. Expensive gifts on his part are his personal decision. And all you need to do is give something for an amount acceptable to you, just as a token of attention.
There are pitfalls in why your ex wishes you a happy birthday: for example, he wants to earn your admiration again and bring you back into the relationship. If you are not interested in anything like that, then no generous gifts are required from you: it is enough, for example, to write a congratulation in the morning in the messenger in your own words in prose. Even a simple “Happy Birthday!” will be enough.

Congratulate, wish, give, but only if you want it sincerely

If there is a child after marriage

This is often the cause of interaction between spouses. Of course, most often the child chooses to be with his mother. But there are also exceptions. It is not the child's fault that the marriage is not happy, and maintaining a good relationship is recommended. You should not create negative conditions for your own baby. Neutral communication does not oblige you to anything. First of all, think about this and try not to allow a negative attitude towards your ex-wife.

Ex-husband and wife rarely remain friends. But even an unpleasant divorce is not a reason to completely cut ties with a person. If the ex-wife is unpleasant, but is the mother of the child, it is enough to simply formally congratulate her via SMS.

It may also be that the ex-wife is married and happy in her new family. Then it’s better not to remind yourself even on a holiday.

In most cases, you should refrain from congratulating and generally interacting with your ex. There are many benefits to consider after a breakup:

New horizons are opening up. There is a chance to find a person who will better appreciate your merits and love you with all his heart.
Free money appears. Which you can spend on yourself and not give up on the things you want.
After a breakup, there is a wonderful opportunity to evaluate the entire period of the relationship. And, starting new ones, no longer make the same mistakes that happened in the past.
There is a lot of free time that you can spend on yourself. Play sports or find a new hobby.

In any case, separation brings pain to both people. Many people hide it, but this pretense does not help them not to feel it. Appreciate the time you spend with your loved one. Remember, someone is waiting for you to break up so that they can be with this particular woman or man. Nothing happens in life for nothing. And if you once loved a girl or guy, it’s worth thinking about why fate gave you this feeling.

What phrases should you use to congratulate?

You can limit yourself to formal and universal ones: wishing success in everything, harmony in life, reasons for joy. If the relationship between you is friendly, then you can approach the issue with humor (“now you are one less year away from retirement, I wish you not to waste your youth!”).

But it’s better to refrain from unkind “jabs” and wishes on topics that are painful for the guy: if you don’t want to sincerely wish something good, then you shouldn’t congratulate this person at all.

It is also better to do without “postcards” on social networks, congratulatory poems written by others and other congratulatory content from the Internet - in any case, this is tasteless and insincere.

Are you planning to give a gift? Something unique and exactly in line with a man’s interests should only be given if you have a truly stable friendship. In all other cases, standardized gifts are suitable - for example, alcohol. There is no need to give personal items as a gift, even if you could have chosen them successfully “for old times’ sake” - this is only appropriate for people in a relationship.

Website www.sympaty.net – Beautiful and Successful. Author: Daria Blinova. The article was checked by a special psychologist Olga Yuryevna Gryzlova. More information about the site's authors

The man didn’t congratulate you on the holiday: what should you do?

In today's article on the website Shtuchka.ru we will figure out what to do and how to properly correct the situation when a man did not congratulate you on an important and significant day.

About the importance of a good mood

Before telling you about such a situation, I would like to first tell you about the consequences that a quarrel, resentment or conflict due to a lover’s forgetfulness can lead to.

In terms of consequences, a quarrel with loved ones is more severe than a quarrel at work or school. Because it all starts with little things and eventually rolls up like a snowball. “The man I love didn’t even congratulate me, how could he forget, our relationship is a trifle for him and means nothing” - when your head is full of such thoughts, you involuntarily come to the conclusion of separation. But this is not a solution and is not the right decision of an adult, intelligent person, especially a woman, since scandals only please our enemies and poison our lives.

Therefore, below we will figure out how to prevent the situation, with the help of self-education and a little cunning, avoid a quarrel and make this day unforgettable for yourself, as well as maintain a wonderful relationship.

The man didn’t congratulate you on the holiday: what to do?

The first and basic rule is to avoid grudges. After all, you can’t always know for sure why this happened. And you can quarrel and ruin the holiday for any reason.

The second rule is that you must forge your own happiness. Therefore, you need to take the situation into your own hands in advance, especially if you know that the man suffers from forgetfulness.

To prevent the man from not congratulating you, gently remind him of the date in advance!

So, let's proceed to the operation: “the man did not forget and congratulated, or an unforgettable holiday.”

You know that today is a significant date for you, so you need to not only wake up in a good mood, but also start taking action. In this case, all means are good. Let's start with brainstorming. Don't sit and wait. You woke up. Let the first thing he sees after waking up be your smile and warm words of congratulations. You can make coffee or breakfast and present it with the same kind words. Proximity is not only a guarantee of endorphins, but also a positive charge for the whole day. Therefore, it is better not to neglect such a pleasant congratulation.

If on an important day you didn’t wake up together, you can write an SMS, a message on a social network, or call. You shouldn’t sit and wait, guess who should call first, congratulate you, and then suffer because the guy didn’t congratulate you. It's just stupid when it comes to two loving people.

If for some reason the first part was not successful for you, then you can use the help of friends, acquaintances and relatives. This stage can be used together with the first one, just to be sure. For example, ask your husband or boyfriend to answer calls while you are busy, under the pretext of a very important call. You go to the shower, and a friend or acquaintance calls you (it’s better to agree in advance). Your accomplice should say that he is calling because he wanted to congratulate you on such and such. Your girlfriend or your mutual friend can simply call your loved one’s number and congratulate you, claiming that they can’t reach you.

With such ardent hints, the likelihood that your beloved man forgot and did not congratulate you on the holiday is completely excluded.

If you know that your lover is forgetful, you can take action in advance. For example, give him a diary, a notebook, where you carefully write down all the holidays, birthdays and significant dates. You can fill out the calendar yourself on your mobile phone, tablet, laptop or computer. Just mark the dates on the wall calendar with a circle. In general, do everything so that he receives reminders from everywhere. The main thing is not to overdo it with dates. Otherwise it will drag on, the first meeting will appear, the first kiss, the first flower, the first cafe, the first chocolate bar, and so on.

The man ignored and did not congratulate you if...

For example, if you are in the position of a mistress, then you have to plan your holiday yourself. In this case, you need to take into account both the day and the time when he will not be busy and will be able to be with you. You need to immediately prepare yourself for the fact that he will spend all the big holidays with his family, so you shouldn’t be offended by the lack of congratulations on these days.

He just didn’t know how important this date was to you because you didn’t talk about it. Such dates include anniversaries of meeting or first kiss. Alas, many men do not have the sentimentality inherent in girls.

If a man has never congratulated you even once, even with a large number of obvious hints, then you should think about it. Also, you should not ignore the fact that from the beginning of the relationship he declares that he does not like holidays and everything connected with them. And also, when he spends significant days with his ex-girlfriend or wife, with friends, he disappears for inexplicable reasons, explaining all this with strange stories and excuses. Here it is very important to weigh everything and not make mistakes. Of course, it is difficult when a relationship lasts several months. But even at the same time, it is worth trying to look at the situation from the outside. It is likely that he is deceiving you, playing a double game.

But, if you have a wonderful relationship, but he has a bad memory, then believe me, everything can be fixed. Good luck and patience. After all, good and strong relationships are painstaking and hard work.

Bruslik Maria – especially for the site Shtuchka.ru